The selfish gene

Is Yan Shanhua dying?

This day came earlier than expected.I thought I would feel relieved and happy because of the news of her death, but I don’t know if I took too many sedative drugs. When I heard the news, I didn’t feel happy, nor did I feel any pain or regret, just...very calm .

After A Yao left, I lay on the sofa, looking at the ceiling above my head, and fell into a state of emptiness.

I recently invented a good way to regulate my emotions. I call it the "ostrich method"-if you don't want to see the sun, just bury your head in the sand.If you don’t want to be troubled, then it’s good not to think about troubled things.

Think only about survival, sleep, eat, go to the toilet, and execute one instruction at a time like an old computer.And those difficult problems that cannot be changed in the short term, don't touch them, don't think about them.As long as you lock them in the corner of your memory and forget them forcibly, your body will become much easier.

"Meow~" The little white cat woke up, jumped onto my body, stretched itself, and started rubbing its furry head against my face.

I was so annoyed that I had no choice but to withdraw my mind and focus on it.

Animals like cats are so annoying, much more annoying than turtles.

"Are you missing Ji Chenfeng?" I stroked the kitten's head and said, "In two days, if he doesn't come back, let's go find him."

On the sixth day, my bank card received money from Ji Chenfeng, no more, no less, 50.

I sat up from the sofa all of a sudden, staring at the string of glaring numbers in disbelief.

Even if Yan Shanhua's life is not long and he no longer needs money for medical treatment, Ji Chenfeng will return the 30 that I borrowed from me later, and who will give him the remaining 20?Where did he get so much money?

And what does he mean?Return the money to me, never owe me again, are you planning to settle with me...from now on?

Anxiously pacing back and forth in the living room, unable to think of an answer, and no one to ask.

How to do?

How to do……

Teeth gnashing on the knuckles of my index finger, I need to do something to distract myself.

Whenever there is an unsolvable problem in the mind, the strength between the teeth will increase.The pain made my brain no longer entangled in Ji Chenfeng's problem with all my strength, allowing me to calm down a little.

Yan Shanhua was about to die, Ji Chenfeng returned the money to me, and wanted to settle with me...he wanted to settle with me...

I stopped walking, as if catching a ray of light from the ignorant darkness, the whole world gradually brightened.

Wait, isn't that what I want?After Yan Shanhua's death, only I know the secret, Ji Chenfeng is no longer a threat, isn't it just right for him to settle with me?

I'm confused.This is the development that echoes my expectations, isn't it?God is helping me, what am I in a hurry for?

Figured it out, I took the swollen knuckles out of my mouth and sat back on the sofa.

Finally it's all coming to an end.My life is about to return to the right track, without Yan Shanhua, without Ji Chenfeng, without any poor and shabby things.

I will become the real "Prince" and take charge of the Sang family's property.

And here...

I looked around and glanced at the messy living room and the takeaway boxes piled up on the coffee table.

No matter how similar it is, it cannot be real.This is not "home", not my home, but just like the illusory illusion given to me by the Xu family and Sang Zhengbai.I will leave here and discard this place, together with the memory of Ji Chenfeng.

After all, she was the woman who gave birth to me, and I don't want to admit that Yan Shanhua's genes are always flowing in my body.And she did keep her promise to me, not revealing the truth to anyone.

Now that she is going to die, all grievances and grievances are gone, not for love but for reason, and I should also go to see her for the last time, just as... I have settled my fate with her.

On the seventh day of the new year, I took good care of myself.He shaved his beard, waxed his head, put on his shirt, vest, and suit pants meticulously, and finally put on a woolen coat and went out.

The hospital where Yan Shanhua works is not far from Flying City, only 10 minutes away from where I live.

I bought a bouquet of carnations at the entrance of the hospital, and according to the hospitalization information A Yao gave me, after being pointed out by the security guards, I made a detour all the way, and finally found a low building surrounded by gardens in a remote corner of the hospital.

Palliative care department, looking up at the sign above my head, I stepped into the depths of the corridor.

The room at the end of the corridor is Yan Shanhua's ward.

There are two beds in the room, but the other one is covered with plastic film, and no one sleeps there for the time being.Maybe in two days, Yan Shanhua's bed will be vacant, just like this one...

Withdrawing my gaze, I casually placed the flowers in my hand on the cabinet next to Yan Shanhua's bed.The sleeping woman woke up when she heard the movement. After realizing that it was me, her eyes were wide open, showing an expression of surprise and joy.

She looked even worse than the last time I saw her.She was as thin as a bone, her cheeks were sunken, her cheekbones were high, and her eyes were terrifyingly large.

"Xiao Nian..." She sat up with difficulty, groping her hands towards me, "Am I dreaming?"

I glanced at her skinny palms, and sat down on the escort chair with my back facing the door, ignoring her intentions.

"Such an expensive medicine, it doesn't work if you take it?"

Yan Shanhua's eyes dimmed a little bit, he withdrew his hand, and said with a sneer: "The medicine is a good medicine, but I didn't take it myself. It's meaningless to me to live two years longer. It's better to die early."

I was taken aback: "Did you stop taking the medicine yourself?"

The ward was a bit hot, so I took off the gloves I was wearing.The purple tooth marks on the knuckles were shocking. I squinted and put the leather gloves on to cover it up a little.

"If I live one more day, I will drag Chenfeng down one more day." Yan Shanhua stared at the snow-white quilt in front of him, like a haggard mummy, "I know he asked you to borrow the money for my medical treatment, but he didn't tell you , I know it too. He didn't want me to die, tried his best to keep me alive, and took me to see a doctor everywhere. I really feel sorry for him. I actually didn't want to live a long time ago, but I was afraid that he would be sad, so I promised him that he would treat me well He doesn't know, this is my retribution, I deserve it."

It's ironic, Ji Chenfeng wants her to live so much, but she just wants to die.

"You really deserve it," I said.

Yan Shanhua's body trembled, and his head lowered even lower.

"I'm the one who's sorry for you, Chenfeng, Mrs. Sang and Mr. Sang..." She covered her face and cried in pain, "Your father was seriously injured and lying in the hospital, I don't know if he will wake up in this life. I was shocked and gave birth to you prematurely. You were small and weak when you were born, and I cried all day long. I don't understand how this kind of thing happened to our family."

"It's really pitiful for you to vote in our family. We can't give you anything. At that time, my brain seemed to be broken, and I kept thinking about these things. Seeing that the Sang family is so rich, I thought I shouldn't have thought of it. She suddenly became agitated, and slapped her face one after another, "I killed you and Chenfeng, I killed you and Chenfeng!"

Although she was terminally ill, she had a lot of strength, and her face became red and swollen after a while.

I frowned and said in a deep voice, "Okay..."

Go crazy in front of me, do everything, is it useful to say these now?Who wants to hear what she has to do?

Yan Shanhua's whipping movement paused, but stopped, but the next second he struggled to get off the bed and knelt down in front of me.

"What are you doing?" I stood up in a panic, driving the escort chair to the ground to make a harsh sound.

"Xiao Nian, it was me, it was my mother's fault, and it was all my fault that I swapped you with Chen Feng back then." She grabbed the corner of my clothes, choked up, and said, "Mom is going to die. All the hatred of the crime will be borne by me. Don't blame Chenfeng, just let him go... let him go..."

He took a step back involuntarily, being held back by the chair behind him.

There is no way back.It's obviously just an ordinary chair, just kick it away, but I seem to have no way to retreat.

Staring at Yan Shanhua in front of her eyes, her gaze ranged from her tear-stained face to her hands tightly grabbing the hem of my clothes.

As she said, all the sins and all the hatred will be borne by her. When she dies, these things will also be taken away by her. Everything ends with her.

After stepping out of here, don't contact Ji Chenfeng again.Cut him out of life, this is the best arrangement.But why... am I so unwilling?

Just nodding his head, he can no longer have anything to do with Ji Chenfeng, but his spine is stiff and unable to bend, and his tongue and the entire mouth begin to go numb.

Because there is no decent breakup?

Yes.How could it end so vaguely?Anyway, it's a lover I personally admit, even if it's over, I should make it clear in person.

It was I who broke up, and I didn't want him.This point must be made clear and must not be fooled.

"You're going to die, and you're still thinking about him." Pulling out the hem of my coat little by little, I helped Yan Shanhua up from the ground, and said lightly, "Don't worry, as long as I can inherit everything from the Sang family, I will pester you." What does he do? I don't really have a deep-rooted love for him. "

Yan Shanhua was temporarily appeased by me, stood up tremblingly, and asked, "...Really?"

I don't know which sentence she asked, is it that I will not pester Ji Chenfeng anymore, or, do I really like him?

Forget it, it doesn't matter.It's all the same anyway.

I helped her to the bed, straightened her grass-like hair, and took a tissue to wipe away the tears on her face.

"Really." I paused and said, "I won't take revenge on him again."

She felt relieved, maybe she was tired from crying and consumed a small amount of energy, and fell asleep after a while.

Crumple up the paper towel and throw it in the trash.I dragged the escort chair and sat in the ward for almost half an hour before I got up, put on my gloves and walked out the door.

Pushing open the door of the ward, I should have strode away without paying attention, but when I caught sight of the figure leaning by the door out of the corner of my eye, I suddenly froze in place.

A few seconds later, I found my wandering soul and looked at Ji Chenfeng who had been standing there for an unknown amount of time with luck.

He was just like on New Year's Eve, with his hands in the pockets of his down jacket, leaning against the wall quietly, until I found him, and then I looked up.

A blurry black shadow flashed before my eyes, and I staggered back a step.If on New Year’s Eve, the way he looked at me was the rain in early autumn, which was cool but still warm, then the way he looked at me now was the strongest and deadliest ice cone on the glacier, leaving only the sharp coldness. .

All the luck disappeared in the eyes he looked at me.

He heard it.

He overheard my conversation with Yan Shanhua just now.

I am done.