transient stability

This scene seemed familiar: I was holding the piece of glass, threatening people not to approach, last time it was in the hospital, this time it was Lin Qiu.

I don't want this, but I just don't want him to forget me, I can't accept it.If he forgets all about it, then what's the point of me being alive?My hand hurts a bit, but it doesn't matter, it will be relieved later.

"Shi'an, come here." Lin Qiu didn't look nervous at all, he looked at me like a passerby, he didn't know what I was thinking at all.

"Didn't you just say you don't remember me?" My hands trembled, and I took two steps back when I saw him approaching, "Bastard, didn't you say you don't remember me?!" I felt the tower in my mind disintegrate and shatter into pieces One piece, he was on the tower at the end of the road, smiling and saying goodbye to me.I broke down and cried, and the hand holding the glass started to bleed, "Do you think I'm sick? You forgot about me and called me a sick person! You obviously don't remember, so what do you want me to do?"

Lin Qiu frowned, and opened his mouth to answer, "You said your name is Shi An..."

I tightened my hand, and suddenly felt that I had nothing to say to him.

Lin Qiu opened his arms towards me, and shouted again, "You said... it's my boyfriend, so why don't you come over? Let me hug you."

I wiped my face with my hand, I couldn't see clearly, I only smelled a smell of rust, I ran up and hugged his waist, crying on his shoulder, "Can you die with me?"

"No." Lin Qiu grabbed my wrist and forcibly removed the shards of glass from my hand. I resisted and hit him, but he couldn't dodge it. He was punched in the jaw and fell to the ground.

I walked up to him, "I like you, how can you forget, why don't you accompany me?!"

Lin Qiu closed his eyes and opened them after a few seconds, "You are sick and need to be cured."

I picked up the piece of glass on the ground that was stained red with my blood, "I don't want to be cured, I don't want you to be with Ning Yuan, he doesn't even want you, what are you thinking about him?!"

Lin Qiu rested his hands on his forehead, as if he was in pain, I cried and laughed, "You are like this when you talk about him, do you know how uncomfortable I am? You are so boring." I raised the glass and looked at him "I hurt you just now? Aren't you a black belt in Taekwondo? You were so fierce when you were chasing me in the hospital, why can't you hide now?" My hand dropped the glass and stuck it on him, Lin Qiu trembled After a moment, he reached out to hold my wrist.I struggled hard and found that he had no strength in his hands. "It's funny, you can't even stand up and you say I can't beat you? You really can lie."

I knelt beside him and bowed my head to kiss him, wanting to finish him after kissing enough.Lin Qiu's eyes were a little distracted, and he panted, "Shi'an, give me a week to remember, wait for me for a week."

"I don't! I want you to think about it now! Now."

"I promise you, I won't lie to you in the future. Didn't you call the ambulance... the blood all over your body is so ugly... don't let people see it, throw the glass away, good boy..." Lin Qiu gasped, After talking for a long time before I finished, I was obsessed with his face, I didn't want to hear what he said at all, put the piece of broken glass aside, cupped his head with both hands and kissed it.

"Shi...an, I can't think of it. It's just that for a while... just take a week off, um—you listen to me."

Lin Qiu talks a lot of nonsense, does he feel afraid of dying?I kissed for a while and found that he was willing to cooperate, so I loosened my jaw and let me in.

That's great...I touched the tip of his tongue and kissed him bit by bit. He took the initiative more before, and I never thought he was so easy to bully.Lin Qiu's appearance was so pretty, the blood on his face made his complexion white, I could feel the blood all over my body boil uncontrollably, and I kissed him harder, "Uh...Lin Qiu, Give you to me, okay?"

"Okay, when I get better...Shi'an..." Lin Qiu put his hand on the back of my neck suddenly, "I promise you whatever you want."

I looked at his chin, blood flowed to his neck, the string of red marks covered by the neckline was still there, and the blood stained him looked alluring.I lowered my head and kissed his neck, licked all the blood, and deepened those marks again.

"Shi'an? Why don't you talk?"

I think Lin Qiu is dying, and his voice is getting quieter, and he looks like he will fall asleep at any time. "Didn't you just hit your head, and it didn't hurt, why are you so weak?" I held him in my arms, and kissed his temples pitifully, "It doesn't matter if you are weak, no one will bully you in the future, they all Can't find us."

"Shi'an." Lin Qiu's lips moved, I lowered my head and bit on it, and he hummed again.

"Lin Qiu, I want to hear you say that I love you, and I will take you away after I say so."

Lin Qiu closed his eyes, "I'll tell you from now on that life will be bad."

"But I want to hear it now, you promise me. Don't sleep, you can sleep after you say so." I hugged his shoulders and shook him, trying to wake him up.

Lin Qiu took a deep breath, "Shi'an, I love you forever, you understand, forever. So...can you go to the hospital later? I want...to hold you every day, not just today."

I cried again as I listened, with sand in my eyes, "Really? You didn't lie to me?"

"I'm not lying to you. You wait for me to wake up, obediently, we have an appointment."

"Aren't you still awake...?"

Lin Qiu's hand held me, trying to hook me up.I stretched out my finger and hooked it with him, "Okay." He took out the box of mints again, "Don't cry, eat two a day, if you don't have any, go to Wang Wenrui, I gave him a box. "I heard the sound of an ambulance, and Lin Qiu grabbed me, "I remember you said in school, when you grow up, you want to draw me...you are so old..."

"Huh!" Did he remember?Lin Qiu remembered me?He didn't forget me?

The ambulance stopped behind me. I turned around and saw four or five people getting out of the car. One of them shouted at me, "Why are you so disobedient? The patient should lie flat and don't move."

They carried Lin Qiu onto the stretcher, and Lin Qiu closed his eyes and said, "Concussion, stab wound under the right collarbone. Qin Shi'an over there, stab wound on the right palm, debridement and suture." Several people looked at me and put I also pulled into the ambulance.After Lin Qiu finished speaking, there was no more sound. I called him all the way and there was no response. When I asked the doctor, he was only told that he had a concussion and was in a short-term coma. He needed to go back for a CT scan to confirm whether there was any brain contusion or intracranial hemorrhage.

I don't understand these things, Lin Qiu told me to wait for him, it should be all right.I fell asleep before arriving at the hospital, and when I woke up, I was lying in the ward with some equipment on my body.I have white gauze wrapped around my right hand, and I remember stitching the wound before I fell asleep.Lin Qiu is not in this room, so I don't know where it is.I pulled my things off and got out of bed to find him.I felt a little dizzy when I got off the ground, and I shook it, and the candy box in my pocket fell to the ground. I remembered what Lin Qiu said, picked up the box, put it in my pocket and put it away.Where is Lin Qiu?I pushed the door open and ran into Jiang Ziyan at the door.

Jiang Ziyan was holding a report card in his hand, and he was a little anxious when he saw me, "Shi'an? Why are you up, go to bed." He walked over in two or three steps, picked me up and sent me back to the room, "the doctor said You have lost a lot of blood, so you need to rest more."

I sat on the bed, "How do you know I'm here?"

"You fell asleep, your school teacher received a call from the hospital and informed me to come."

"Oh..." Probably the hospital checked the communication records on my mobile phone, and Mr. He was in front.I saw that Jiang Ziyan was too lazy to lose his temper, he just wanted to be alone and quiet, and the only person he wanted to see was Lin Qiu.

"Where is the man who came with me, I'm going to find him."

Jiang Ziyan fetched water with a basin, rubbed a towel and wiped my face, "That doctor you like?"

I glanced at him, did he investigate Lin Qiu?Have you been to the hospital?Why doesn't he scold me anymore?

I kept silent and didn't want to reply to him, otherwise he would quarrel with me again.Lin Qiu is a man. Jiang Ziyan thought he was a woman before, so he probably wouldn't agree with me dating Lin Qiu.

"He's not here, he's transferred to another hospital." After Jiang Ziyan wiped my face and neck, he took my hand to wipe again.

I don't have much strength, too lazy to move, "Where did he go?"

"His family is here. I don't know where he's going. I just know he's not here." Jiang Ziyan wiped my hands without scolding me, and put the report card in the bedside cabinet, "You're fine, just bleeding It’s a little too much, and it’s reported that it’s moderately anemic, so I’ll transfuse some blood later.”

"Family?" Lin Qiu never told me about his family, who picked him up? "Which family member? Which hospital is he in?"

Jiang Ziyan was silent for a while, then said slowly: "Shi'an, did you commit suicide for him?"

The author says:

Shi'an is mixed bipolar, with alternate episodes of mania and depression in a short period of time.

Lin Qiu's retrograde forgetfulness after the concussion didn't remember Shi An, he just lied to prevent him from making a mistake.