Beauty has a lot of bad thoughts

When the first ray of dawn illuminated Karuizawa, Xue Dingbang woke up.

Standing by the floor-to-ceiling windows, he watched the beautiful silhouette of the mountain range illuminated by the yet-to-rise sun.

This night, Maeda Chris didn't attack him, and didn't even take the initiative to approach him or be by his side.

Xue Dingbang only feels discouraged and hopeless, even if Chris Maeda cares about him no matter how much he loves him... there is an insurmountable gap between them, and there is also an indelible gap.

They may not be able to easily return to their previous intimate relationships in the future.

Chris Maeda was hurt, and now he is still clinging to Xue Dingbang, probably because of the obsession generated by the love that he couldn't ask for.It's just unwillingness, how much of the so-called love will be kept in such harm?How long will it last, without being worn down by time?

When the sun poked out his red face from behind the mountains, his warm body pressed against Xue Dingbang's back.

The little sun belonging to Xue Dingbang put his arms around his body, with a sleepy and lazy voice, as sweet as honey: "Good morning, Dingbangsang. Today is also a beautiful day. Can you talk to Dingbang?" San is together, I feel so happy. The sun is out, shall we have some breakfast? This hotel will provide Japanese breakfast, which is very good."

Xue Dingbang's indifferent expression was a little loose, he didn't expect Maeda Chris to be so close to him.

But he wasn't quite ready.

He grabbed Chris Maeda's hand clasped on his chest, opened it, and pushed him away.

The two finished their breakfast quietly, and returned to Chris Maeda's hometown with their luggage.Chris Maeda got a Mazar for Xue Dingbang and asked him to sit in the yard.

"Dingbangsang, I'm going to start cleaning." Chris Maeda rolled up his sleeves, got a white cloth to cover his hair, and tied a broom with his apron.With a confident and energetic look, "Are you tired from the long journey? If Dingbangsang wants to help, I'll wait for you inside. If you want to rest, just rest here!"

Xue Dingbang remained silent.He sat in the middle of the desolate and lonely courtyard, staring blankly at the thin figure of Chris Maeda, busy in and out of the house.

Clean the cobwebs on the roof first, then on the walls.Then sweep the floor... because the family has not paid the utility bill for several months, so there is no water or electricity in the house.The vacuum cleaner couldn't be used, so Maeda Chris used a broom to sweep it around a little bit. Even with his face covered, he was still coughing from the dust.

He skillfully removed the broken doors and windows and put them in the yard to knock off the dust.Take old newspapers and glue at the hole, and paste it up temporarily with ease.

The way Chris Maeda works can be seen at a glance-he often does these things. Chris Maeda, who left home at the age of 14, is very proficient in everything in his hometown and all the work at home.

It hurts to be skilled.

Since there was no water at home, Chris Maeda ran to the farmland well under the hillside of their house and brought back a large bucket of water.At this time, his thin and thin body contained amazing strength.The bucket was very big, but he didn't spill much out.

Getting a rag, Chris Maeda wiped down the hallway and the cleaned house.He knelt on the ground, his buttocks pouted and his feet bare, humming and humming very hard.

Maeda Chris has been busy from the morning to the sunset.The temperature in Karuizawa is not high in autumn. His hands soaked in cold water are freezing cold, and his feet without shoes are also red from the cold.His cheeks were also flushed due to sweating from work, and thin beads of sweat hung on his forehead and the tip of his nose.

At noon, the two ate some emergency canned food they found from home, and they still hadn't finished eating the canned food at night.

Chris Maeda got the autumn and winter quilts from the closet and spread them out, and brought Schrödingbang, who had been sitting in the courtyard all day, into the house.

"Sorry, Dingbangsang, I haven't finished cleaning yet." Chris Maeda took a breath and looked tired, "Tomorrow should be fine. I will clean the kitchen and bathroom tomorrow, as well as the living room and storage room. The country house is broken It’s a bit broken, but it’s still pretty big when it’s repaired, at least we don’t have to be so crowded.”

The quilt has not been dried and has a musty smell.

Chris Maeda just covered his nose with the smell.

"Dingbangsang, it shouldn't rain tomorrow. I'll dry the quilt tomorrow, is that okay?" Chris Maeda looked at Xue Dingbang very apologetically, jumped into the yard, and installed the sliding door pasted with newspaper. "Let's make do with it today! I'll get up early tomorrow morning to work! It seems to be cold at night, the electricity is out, there is no kotatsu, and there is no stove. Sorry, the firewood is damp! We'd better not burn it. We ……I can……"

Under the pale light of the emergency lighting, Chris Maeda's face flushed unnaturally because of embarrassment and shyness: "I...I'm not saying...it must be like that! I won't attack Dingbangsang again , as long as you don’t want to, I won’t attack you! Me, can we sleep together? Just sleep together! My body is still warm, can I replace the heater to warm you?”

Xue Dingbang did not answer.

Neither for nor against.

His figure standing in the darkness was darker and deeper than the night.

Also more icy and speechless.

Chris Maeda believed in the credo of "If you don't speak, I'll take it as if you agreed", and he directly regarded Xue Dingbang as agreeing.He reached out to unbutton Schrödingbang's clothes, took off his dirty coat, and then his crumpled shirt.

"I'm sorry, Dingbangsang." Chris Maeda caressed the scar on Xue Dingbang's chest with his fingertips. There were round tooth marks and a few hard blood scabs.Maeda Chris only felt a throbbing pain in his heart, wrinkled his nose, and held back his tears, "It hurts, doesn't it? It's cold, isn't it? I'm so sorry! You will never be alone again! I will Always with you."

Xue Dingbang really felt very cold, a big hole was opened in his heart, and the cold wind was pouring into his soul.

Maeda Chris's cold fingertips gently brushed around the wound.His eyes full of admiration were as bright as the stars.

"Please let me warm you." Chris Maeda said, he hugged Xue Dingbang's body and lay down, and together with Xue Dingbang got into the musty-smelling quilt.

The autumn wind passed through the sliding door and entered the room through the small gap.The strong wind urges the airflow, and the shaking is so unstable that the sliding door creaks and creaks.In the old houses, the wood crumbles and whispers at night.The hazy moonlight shakes the tree shadows, reflecting on the sliding door, dancing in the night.

Xue Dingbang opened his eyes in the darkness, staring at the wood grain on the ceiling.

Those unpredictable shapes are like ghosts walking at night.Every expression is so distorted, as if screaming, roaring, and sneering...

At some point, Xue Dingbang fell asleep.When he woke up again, Maeda Chris was not by his side.

The bed was still warm, and the sky had just dawned.Xue Dingbang didn't want to move, he didn't even want to get his phone to check what time it is.He just lay there, spending his life at will as time went by.

"Dingbangsang, are you up?" Chris Maeda's sweet and crisp voice came from above his head, followed by his pretty face flushed with cold, "I went to the field to pick some edible vegetables! Look, they are super fresh Oh! I'll make you something to eat, if you're not feeling well, you can lie down for a while longer!"

Chris Maeda walked away with bare feet.

Xue Dingbang lay in bed for a while, and finally got up.Because—Chris Maeda coughed too loudly.He casually put on some clothes and walked through the corridor looking for the sound.

Chris Maeda is in the kitchen, squatting in front of the rural wood-burning earthen stove.As Chris Maeda said - firewood gets more smoke than fire when it gets wet.The poor chef's fair and pretty little face, smoked his face, and then wiped it with his hand, looks like a tabby cat.

He couldn't stop coughing, tears streaming down his face.

He hasn't given up yet, stubbornly trying to start a fire.

"Dingbangsang... Cough! Cough! Are you up?" Chris Maeda wiped his face and hurried to Xue Dingbang, trying to push him away, "Don't come here, there's a lot of smoke here! It's choking you But it’s not good! Cough cough cough! Wait a little longer, I’ll be fine soon! It’s cold, Dingbangsang, you can’t wear so little, go back quickly! I still have to watch the fire... Cough cough cough cough cough... ..."

Chris Maeda felt sorry for Xue Dingbang, really.But his clumsy appearance of caring for others is even more distressing.

Xue Dingbang's indifferent expression did not relax much.He just nodded, turned and left the kitchen, and sat down on the corridor.

Maeda Chris worked for more than 30 minutes, and brought out a steaming bowl of vegetable soup: "Dingbangsang, many seasonings at home are out of date, so... I just put a little salt, let's make do with it, shall we? Drink Warm up your body? I’ll go to dry the quilt first, look, the weather is great today! It’s another beautiful day!”

"Because, I'm with you."

Originally wanted to kiss Xue Dingbang, Maeda Chris suddenly found that his face was covered in ashes.He scratched his cheek embarrassingly, and left with a smile.

Xue Dingbang didn't take a sip of the vegetable soup in his hand after it was cold.The sun is really good today, but it is also cold enough.A small autumn leaf belonging to the beautiful scenery of Karuizawa was blown by the wind and fell into the vegetable soup bowl.

It's half red, half white...

Red as a rose.

White as moonlight.

It floats on the clear soup, quietly and silently, accompanying the lonely and frustrated man.

When Chris Maeda came back and saw the untouched soup, he curled his lips in grievance, but didn't say anything.

This night, the quilt exudes the fragrance of the sun.They still have no water and no electricity.Maeda Chris, who has not showered for two days, feels uncomfortable all over.He laughed at himself and said, "Has Dingbangsang smelled my body? I heard that if the perfume is concentrated, it will smell bad. If it is diluted with alcohol, it will have a fragrance."

Xue Dingbang ignored Chris Maeda's nagging, he has been nagging all the time these days.Even if he didn't get a response, he still stubbornly talked to Xue Dingbang.

"Dingbangsang, shall we pay the utility bill tomorrow?" Chris Maeda used his body temperature to warm the cold Xue Dingbang, "I will trouble you again tomorrow. Good night, I love you..."

A tear slipped down his cheek, across Xue Dingbang's cold and painful chest.