Bury me with a sprig of white camellia

71.

In a daze.

Suddenly a little tired.

I went home with Xie Yunyi, he held my hand, it was so warm.

But when I got out of the car, I went back to the hospital.

He let go of my hand and put me on the bed.

With cold eyes, he still doesn't like me.

72.

The lunch box in the hospital was so bad that I didn't even want to eat.

The stomach is empty and hurts like a knife.

Xie Yunyi disappeared again.

Xiao Chen said that he has been in a bad state recently, so let me forgive you.

When I was bored, I searched Xia Niansui's circle of friends again, and his latest post was a picture.

There is no scar on the white and slender hand, which is extremely beautiful, and there is a ring on the ring finger.

The lens seems to be intentional, and the letters engraved on it are set off very clearly.

—xyy.

I hugged my mobile phone and blinked. In the winter when the windows were not open, I stubbornly believed that there must be a strong wind outside.

Otherwise, why would my eyes be so sore all of a sudden?

Actually, I'm fine without me.

How nice Xia Niansui is.

It's clean, it's more suitable for Xie Yunyi.

Two clean people are a good match.

I rubbed my belly which was getting rounder, and looked at the dead branches of the big tree outside the window.

Turn off the phone, radiation is not good for the baby.

I quietly asked the doctor today, and he said that I am great and strong, and I can live for another six months!

But Xie Yunyi, will you love me for the last half year?

73.

Xie Yunyi still didn't come.

The doctor injected me with painkillers, which barely stopped the knife-like pain in the back of my neck.

Perhaps it was because of the painkiller, my body felt cold for a while, and I could vaguely feel the cold liquid flowing along the blood vessels, slowly spreading to the depths of the hot blood.

I lay on the hospital bed and slept all afternoon, dreaming about a long, long time ago in a daze.

At the school's music festival, Senior Xie and my brother in name, wearing white shirts, performed four-handed playing under the watchful eyes of the whole school.

The sound of the music leaked out of the stereo like running water. I sat under the dark stage and stared at the shining two people on the stage. The bitterness in my heart was indescribable.

For Xie Yunyi.

Xia Weiran is just his junior, a poor little classmate with psychological shadows.

He is sympathetic, gentle, considerate and considerate, and he can't bear to have a poor child thrown into the darkness and forgotten by everyone.

My eyelids are heavy and heavy.

It was you who gave me hope.

It also made me greedy, hoping for more nostalgia.

74.

Xie Yunyi came to see me this morning, and he brought me a pot of flowers.

White camellia.

He told me to stare at the potted flower, don't raise it to death.

When Xie Yunyi spoke, his eyes still did not fall on me.

I agreed in a low voice, without making any noise.

so tired.

Xie Yunyi must have been forced to be very tired by me.

……

I should let him go.

75.

I remembered a few bits and pieces.

When Xia Niansui and Xie Yunyi were together, their relationship was always vigorous.

Walking through the groves in summer, a long guard lock on the top of Baixi Mountain.

I stood in the dark and peeked, envious.

Xia Niansui is so nice, he has no scars on his hands, he has been held in the palm of his family since he was a child, he looks more like an omega than me.

Xie Yunyi and his childhood sweetheart, it is impossible for me to get close to them no matter what.

I stared at the white camellia on the bed, the white petals were so cool.

One petal, two petals... Today's white camellia dropped three petals.

I am listening.

The previous caregiver no longer supervises me and only shows up when I need it.

So I called him into the house.

"Open the window for me, thank you."

The nurse refused my request and replied, "It's snowing outside, be careful of the wind and cold."

Oh, it's snowing outside again.

76.

I'm not emotionally stable today, I've been crying and biting my wrist.

Xie Yunyi, Xie Yunyi, Xie Yunyi.

Why don't you say I love you.

I am sorry for myself.

Because I suddenly discovered that I have been with Xie Yunyi for so many years, and it seems that the only thing that maintains our relationship is sex.

How mean I am.

I seduced someone else's alpha.

I have no shame.

IM so tired.

77.

There was so much noise yesterday that I almost lost my tire gas.

My stomach hurts, so I learned how to embroider a little sheep.

The doll is not easy to sew, and I have several holes in my hand.

Xie Yunyi came to the hospital yesterday and happened to see me crying.

He must have been drinking, and he smelled very smoky.

His eyes were red when he entered the door, he came in silently, then raised his hand and smashed the things beside my bed to the ground.

There was a crackling sound of things breaking, and I screamed and cried like crazy.

"What do you want from me?"

He strangled my neck uncontrollably in front of Xiao Chen, as if he wanted to strangle me to death.

I hurt so much, I hurt so much... I want Xie Yunyi to kiss me, but he is not happy now, it will only make me hurt more.

His pheromone smells like lemon tea. It used to smell harmless, but now I feel cold.

The lemon tea was iced and made me shiver.

Xie Yunyi was furious, "I'm really going to be driven crazy by you! What do you think I can do? What do you want me to do?"

I hugged my stomach, slowly fell silent, and stared into his eyes silently.

I whispered in my heart, you can give up on me.

I won't force you anymore, you can go find Xia Niansui.

78.

pain.

The pain passed out.

Painkillers were given twice.

The gland was wrapped in a white bandage and I could feel it festering.

In the confusion, I saw my alpha friend again.

He looked at me very sadly.

For no reason, I thought of the time when Xia Niansui was with Xie Yunyi after he went abroad.

At that time, he was always depressed and liked to call me Xiaoxia.

Occasionally, he would tell me that your brother was like this when he was a child.

He always called me Xiaoxia.

When he was called Xia Niansui, did he also call him Xiaoxia?

79.

I dug out a letter from the cabinet, Xie Yunyi wrote me a reply letter from psychological counseling in high school.

Dear Xiaoxia classmate:

hello.Don't always feel dirty, you look cute, it's not your fault, don't blame yourself.

You are the most obedient and sensible omega I have ever seen.

Words are always pale, I can't express all the evaluations of you in my heart, but I believe in you and will go out!

I'd be more than happy to help you with this.

Don't worry I'll tell others, put it in the small mailbox by the side door next time you send a letter.I specially pretended for you, it is a little secret between me and you, remember to keep it

dense.

Hope you are healthy and happy.

- your senior

Xie Yunyi

80.

Am I dying?

81.

He has come to accompany me.

Although I still don't smile, I am very satisfied when he hugs me and my back is in his arms.

"Of course, are you obedient? Why don't you always listen to me..."

His dark circles are so heavy, but unfortunately I don't have the strength to put my arms around his neck.

I want to leave him with a kiss.

"Thank you Yunyi..."

Day and night, I tossed and turned, thought for a long time and struggled for a long time, and finally decided to be more generous and not be so selfish before I died.

So I curled up the corners of my mouth and smiled, pretending to be cheerful and lively, and patted him on the shoulder.

It's not really a shot, maybe it's just a touch.

"Thank you Yunyi!"

I raised my voice.

He looked at me, waiting for my next sentence.

Well, in fact, I am still not calm enough to say what I said.

"...When I die, you can marry Xia Niansui!"

He still seemed very unhappy, but my reaction was getting more and more sluggish, like a bear preparing to hibernate.

Why is Xie Yunyi unhappy?

I'm already planning to let him go.

Don't worry, senior Xie, my little brother Xie!

Even if you don't love me, I still like you very much!

After I'm gone, I will never come out in your dream to scare you!

I will never use suicide to argue with you not to break up!

82.

Xie Yunyi has come to accompany me every day recently.

The doctor said I was about to give birth.

Hope it's a little alpha!

Be like Xie Yunyi, don't be like me!

Little troublemaker, I really wronged you when you got into my stomach.

Your little daddy is a badass.

But he loves you very much.

83.

So cold.

Dreamed about a lot of past events.

Xia Niansui decided to go abroad, and broke up with Xie Yunyi before leaving.

"Brother Xie, I'm sorry. We all have to wait a little longer. We will continue when I return to China."

Xie Yunyi looked sad.

I am also very sad.

It took a lot of effort to get into the same university as Xie Yunyi.

At this time, it was time for me to have an operation, and my father asked me if I wanted to be an omega or a beta.

I said I want to be an omega.

-But your glands are severely damaged and have been repaired several times before. After this operation, there is no guarantee that your glands will not have any problems again.

- How good is it to be a beta?

-But beta, you can't be tagged by people you like.

You can't tag favorites either.

Father finally silently agreed.

Mother should be happy for me.

Her son is not trash.

He has been admitted to a very good university, although he is still not as good as Xia Niansui.

84.

During the years when I was with Xie Yunyi, I almost tried every means to please Xie Yunyi.

When Xie Yunyi said that he likes white camellia, I was almost glad.

Fortunately, I did not choose to do beta.

Luckily my pheromone is white camellia.

I really want Xie Yunyi to like me.

I have kept intact the letters he wrote to me.

I only dared to approach Xie Yunyi after they broke up.

He always regarded me as a junior, he seemed to have all his heart on Xia Niansui, and I couldn't share it.

After a long time, taking advantage of the alcohol, the two of us rolled together in a daze.

It wasn't in heat then and he didn't tag me.

I carefully sat on the edge of the bed, and whispered to his arched back, "Brother Xie...can we try?"

He was bent over, and the red marks on his back were shocking.

Xie Yunyi didn't smoke on weekdays, but that day she sat by the bed and smoked two cigarettes for the first time.

Finally he looked back at me and said flatly, okay.

My world suddenly lit up.

I started to learn how to be a good omega.

85.

The first time Xie Yunyi broke up with me was in the first year after dating.

I dug out a photo of him and Xia Niansui from one of his books.

Jealousy drives me crazy.

When Xie Yunyi was not at home, I sorted out all the things he had hidden about Xia Niansui.

I sat cross-legged in the living room with a lighter and burned one by one.

When Xie Yunyi came back, I was burning the last photo of them together.The contours of the faces of the two people were engulfed by the flames into scorched edges.

He was panicking, I had never seen such a contorted expression on his face.

"Xia Weiran, you are crazy!"

I turned my head, grinned at him with a bright smile, shook the last half of the photo in my hand, and shook off the ashes under his gaze.

Throwing the fruit knife aside, I carved a few blurred words on my arm, which were hideous and terrifying.

- don't leave me.

86.

The dead mother was waving to me.

She was as gentle and kind as she used to help me with my homework, but turned gloomy in an instant.

"Of course...you must surpass Xia Niansui."

"It's something that belongs to us, you have to learn to snatch it back."

There are all kinds of people in the dirty alleys, and the broken bamboo mat is our home.

Three drunk male alphas came in that day.

They undressed my mother and dragged me.

My immature glands were chewed out, and my mother was lying on the cold floor twitching from the forced marking.

The next day, my mother was wearing a white dress, smiling with me as usual, and making breakfast for me in the kitchen.

Around eight o'clock, she wiped her hands on her apron and tapped me on the shoulder.

"Of course..." She spoke slowly, with a smile on the corner of her mouth, but no matter how she looked at it, she looked sad, "Mom created an opportunity for you, you should cherish it."

She gave me a rare ten-yuan bill and allowed me to buy snacks at street shops.

When I came back happily, the bandage on the back of my neck was already soaked with blood, and the wound was torn and painful, but I was so happy.

A male beta, dressed immaculately, stood outside my door with his head bowed silently until I approached.

I saw my mother being let down from the rope, her face was livid and she would never wake up again.

My father held me in his arms, his voice hoarse, "...I failed your mother."

"And you."

87.

I am a student who graduated from a literature major, and I have tried to express my feelings by publishing my own articles on the Internet before.

Recently, a book happened to be published, and the publisher came to ask for my opinion.

The name of the book is "Bury Me A Branch of White Camellia".

pretty good.

I plan to give Xie Yunyi the copy that the publishing house left me.

88.

Xia Niansui's circle of friends has been updated again.

I'm too lazy to take a closer look this time.

I'm very tired.

Pain filled my life.

Xie Yunyi didn't come to see me again.

But I don't want to push him anymore.

He has his way to go, and I have my way back.

89.

The white camellia has dried up again.

The nurse said he died of freezing.

This time I offered to let him take it out for me and throw it away.

My alpha friend is always with me.

I can't see his face clearly, it doesn't matter, at least he comes every day with a stick of white camellia in his hand, quietly listening to me tell those long-winded stories.

90.

Winter is over.

spring is coming.

91.

The last time I told a story to my alpha friend.

When this story is over, I have nothing more to say.

I shook his shoulder, trying to pull out a smile.

"Goodbye, my friend."

There is no need to come here again.

92.

I fell asleep in my dream.

It still hurts.

But I heard someone crying.

His big warm hand wrapped my palm, and cold tears fell on the back of my hand, but I didn't want to open my eyes to wipe it for him.

Who is he, I don't want to know.

no need.

"Of course...how can I keep you?"

93.

During our relationship with Xie Yunyi, we quarreled dozens of times, big and small.

He always thinks I'm sick, and he says I'm driving me crazy.

I said I was a lunatic, you just have the heart to watch me die.

"Do you like me, or is it because of Xia Nian and I?"

He didn't say a word, looking at me with complicated eyes.

It was my father who forced him to get married.

I was very happy that day.

Xie Yunyi stood beside me, with an expression on his face that could not tell whether he was happy or unhappy.

Probably unhappy.

Who wants to marry someone they don't like?

94.

I took a trip through the gate of hell, and our child was finally born.

It's a pity, he is a little omega with white camellia flavor.

Xie Yunyi would not like him.

Ugh.

I sighed, sorry.

I have done many things wrong in my life.

When I was a child, I couldn't find the clue, so I really went to the canteen to buy snacks.

When I grew up, I shamelessly messed with my brother's boyfriend.

No one would find me worthy of sympathy.

95.

The function of the gland has already completely failed.

I am quietly waiting for the last ray of wind like a dead candle.

According to the nurse, Xie Yunyi never showed up in the hospital, nor did she hold our child.

Sure enough, I don't like it.

I thought I loved Wu and Wu, but in the end I just hated Wu and Wu.

96.

Holding on for the last time, I knit a light green towel for my child.

My father told me not to worry.

I smiled and said, I went to find my mother.

His eyes were a little red.

97.

Xie Yunyi came at night.

As usual, he didn't say anything, and he held me in his arms without saying a word.

Is it an illusion?

I actually thought he was sad.

how come……

98.

I also knitted a towel for Xie Yunyi.

I took off my wedding ring, which left a noticeable mark on the tip of my finger after wearing it for a long time.

The little silver thing was thrown off the windowsill by me.

In my next life, I want to be a white camellia.

How good it is to grow in the soil.

It won't hurt Xie Yunyi to bear me for so long.

99.

I asked the nurse to open the window for ventilation, and the sun was shining on me, so warm.

Open a certain small box and pull out the letter Xie Yunyi wrote to me.

I read them over and over several times, giggling at them.

As night fell, I let the nurse hold the baby.

He is thin and small, and he hasn't grown up yet.

I kissed his forehead.

Dear Xiaobai Shancha, Dad is going to become a gust of wind and travel around the world.

In the future, if something happens, hug the sky.

I love you.

love you too big daddy

100.

Xie Yunyi, I let you go.