withered lover

After a brief indulgence on Christmas Eve, Du Zhinian returned to a busy working state.

He got up early to wash up, and Shen Guiwan was still curled up on the bed.

In the early morning of midwinter, it began to snow. Even if Shen Guiwan woke up, he would not get up immediately. He would sleep on the bed for about half an hour to replenish his energy.

He relieved Du Zhinian last night, and his body was a little overwhelmed. The sound of Du Zhinian getting up this morning did not wake him up.

A corner of the quilt was rolled into a ball by Shen Guiwan and held in his arms, but his right hand was habitually clenched into a fist.

This is a habit he developed after he got his palm wound stitched up. Now that the wound has been stitched, this habit has not been changed immediately.

Shen Guiwan held the quilt in her arms, her bare back was exposed, and a small piece of white nape was faintly visible under the dark pajamas.

Du Zhinian put back the quilt that he had lifted when he got up, bowed his head and kissed Shen Guiwan's forehead.

He looked at Shen Guiwan's slightly opened mouth for breathing, and lightly rubbed his fingertips over his slightly swollen and red lips.

In his sleep, Shen Guiwan hummed a single sound of protest from his nasal cavity, and buried his head against the quilt.

Du Zhinian found his reaction amusing, teased him several times, and stopped before Shen Guiwan fully woke up.

Du Zhinian went to the hospital after breakfast, Shen Guiwan opened his eyes an hour after he left home.

Shen Guiwan slept late last night, and had another fantastic dream this morning, but he is still not fully awake.

He sat on the bed with his head bowed. A few seconds later, he fell forward and half lay on the pillow. His arched back shook from side to side for a while before he lost his balance and fell askew on the bed.

Shen Guiwan maintained this position and slept for another half an hour, until the phone vibrated when it received a call.

"Hello?" Shen Guiwan huddled under the quilt and picked up the phone, his curled up body slowly stretched out, stretching a long waist under the quilt.

"Are you up? There's breakfast for you in the refrigerator, remember to eat it." Du Zhinian's gentle voice came from the phone with a smile, and his tone was much more relaxed than before the stitches were removed.

"Just woke up." Shen Guiwan lay on the pillow and yawned silently.

He was used to Du Zhinian's sudden phone calls. Du Zhinian answered whatever he asked, never perfunctory, and never took the initiative to talk about anything.

However, Du Zhinian was very busy, and he usually hung up on impromptu calls after a few words.

When the monotonous mechanical busy tone came from the phone again, Shen Guiwan got up from the bed, and walked to the refrigerator with dragging steps.

The breakfast Du Zhinian bought was handmade steamed buns and freshly ground soy milk from a nearby bun shop.

Shen Guiwan picked up a small steamed bun and stuffed it into his mouth, biting the slightly sticky bun skin with his teeth, a stream of warm meat juice flowed out from the gap in the bun skin.

The filling of the steamed buns is fresh and sweet, but there is a faint fishy smell of meat. Shen Guiwan feels uncomfortable eating it, but fortunately, Du Zhinian didn't leave much for him.

He bravely stuffed three small buns into his stomach, and gulped down soy milk to cover the remaining taste in his mouth.

After finishing breakfast, Shen Guiwan nestled into the bedroom again.

He stopped reading in front of the fireplace, and opened the curtains, sitting on the bay window to watch the scenery downstairs.

The bedroom can't see the hillside of the park with withered green grass in winter, but can see the trail winding out from the back of the hillside and the iron fence covered with vines.

The winter sky is covered with gray and white haze, the delicate flowers in the park are decaying, and the vines on the fence are no longer lush. After the temperature plummets, there are few tourists in the park. Only a few morning exercises can be seen here and there. A desolate scene.

Shen Guiwan leaned against the glass window and watched for a while, his breath condensed into white mist on the glass, blurring the scenery outside the window.

He reached out to wipe off the water vapor, and pressed his fingertips against the glass. The cold touch made him withdraw his hand quickly.

Moisture remained on the fingertips, Shen Guiwan rubbed them a few times, jumped off the bay window, and nestled in front of the fireplace to dry his fingers.

After his fingers warmed up, he went to the kitchen to make another cup of sweet orange black tea, and went into Du Zhinian's study to read.

When the sun was setting in the evening, Shen Guiwan put down his book and went to the kitchen.

He cooked a bowl of millet porridge, and sat on the balcony with the bowl in hand, watching the slowly setting sun in the distance.

When the afterglow of the setting sun was completely swallowed up by the night, and the dazzling neon lights illuminated the night sky, Shen Guiwan finished his millet porridge, and Du Zhinian also came back.

Shen Guiwan took a shower and lay on the bed with him, the two of them watched a love movie with an ambiguous tone, and when the plot reached its climax, they used the dim light of the projector to linger under the quilt.

In the last few days of the year, Shen Guiwan wore Du Zhinian's pajamas and lived in his apartment as usual, occasionally went downstairs for a walk, and stopped by the supermarket to buy some fresh vegetables on his way home.

Du Zhinian wasn't at home for dinner, so Shen Guiwan cooked some noodles in clear soup to fill his stomach.

He couldn't eat too greasy food, but he honestly ate three meals a day during this period, and felt that his physical condition was much better than that at Shen's house.

Shen Guiwan thought, if he could keep recuperating like this, maybe after a while, he would be able to eat mandarin duck pot with Du Zhinian.

I just don't know if he will still be Du Zhinian's lover by that time.

Maybe they broke up long ago, not necessarily.

The days at the end of the year passed quickly, and time quietly reached the last day of the year in the Gregorian calendar.

With less than twenty hours left before the new year, Du Zhinian went to work in the hospital as usual.

But different from usual, before leaving today, Du Zhinian lay beside Shen Guiwan, and ordered a bunch of fruits and various refrigerated meats online with his mobile phone.

He put on a posture that he wanted to accompany Shen Guiwan to spend the New Year's Eve together, but after ordering the ingredients, he said before leaving the house: "There may be a dinner party for the New Year's Eve at night, I will try to come back as early as possible, if you don't like eating outside, you can make it yourself Order something delicious."

Du Zhinian was very busy during this period, and he rarely had time to have dinner with Shen Gui. Yesterday, he came back a little early by accident. When he saw Shen Guiwan's dinner with a clear soup and a lot of vegetables in the refrigerator, he suddenly doubted that he usually Did he treat him badly?

"Understood." Shen Guiwan didn't wake up, lying on the bed listlessly, not paying attention to Du Zhinian's behavior of filling the refrigerator.

Du Zhinian stretched out his hand and gently pinched his cheek, and said with a smile, "Then I'm going to work."

"Bye bye." Shen Guiwan stretched out a hand from under the quilt, and waved Du Zhinian perfunctorily twice.

Shen Gui went back to sleep late, didn't get up until noon, read a book after lunch, and lay down to take a nap again after getting sleepy.

Usually he would sleep until the evening, but today he was woken up by the doorbell after not sleeping for a long time.

The ingredients Du Zhinian ordered were delivered, and Shen Guiwan lingered to get up to clean them up, sorted the ingredients into preservation and refrigeration, washed an apple and ate it.

In fact, he has not paid attention to the dates of New Year's Day and New Year's Day for three years. To him, these festivals are just ordinary days when Shen Lu goes out and does not return, and there is no slight difference from any day in the past.

He will not be hurt or blessed these days, so naturally there will be no disgust and expectations.

Shen Guiwan didn't intend to spend time cooking the so-called "New Year's Eve dinner" for himself, but the city center was still different from the suburbs. Even though he had no sense of festivities, the noise from outside the window was still constantly reminding him: New Year's Eve The year is about to begin.

A large-scale event was planned in the square in front of the shopping mall, but Du Zhinian's apartment could not be seen, only the noisy voice amplified several times by the microphone could be vaguely heard.

Shen Guiwan stood in the living room and listened for a while, then closed the doors and windows, and locked himself in Du Zhinian's bedroom.

However, the continuous sound could not be blocked. He heard it late into the night from the evening, and finally turned on the TV in the last half hour before the arrival of the New Year.

Shen Guiwan switched channels boredly, but couldn't find any interesting program after searching over and over again, so he just stopped at a local station.

The local station had already finished broadcasting all the programs, and the host was talking about the New Year's Day speech that had been written in advance. The long and boring, exaggerated tone made this blessing a little less sincere.

Shen Guiwan listened expressionlessly, and the host, after finishing his congratulatory remarks, began to invite the audience in front of the screen to count down to the new year.

"3-2-1!"

The door of the apartment opened with a bang.

"happy New Year!"

Du Zhinian, who smelled of alcohol, staggered against the door frame, walked in slowly while leaning on the wall.

Shen Guiwan threw away the remote control the moment the door opened, he stood between the living room and the kitchen, staring at Du Zhinian in front of him without blinking.

Du Zhinian threw his bag on the ground, walked forward a few steps, and blocked Shen Guiwan's shoulder with his open arms.

"I drank too much, my stomach hurts." He hung on Shen Guiwan's shoulders, almost putting his whole body weight on it.

Shen Guiwan was so crushed that he staggered two steps and almost fell to the ground.

Du Zhinian breathed heavily with the smell of alcohol, and there was a suppressed moan in his throat, as if he was enduring severe pain.

Shen Guiwan's nostrils were filled with a strong smell of alcohol, he bit his lower lip tightly, and helped Du Zhinian to sit on the ground.

But even after sitting down, Du Zhinian still hugged Shen Guiwan tightly.

"Does it hurt?" Shen Guiwan stroked his back up and down.

Du Zhinian lay on Shen Guiwan's neck and let out a suppressed gasp, his alcohol-smelling breath fell on Shen Guiwan's body, burning his pale skin reddened.

"A little bit, there is stomach medicine in the medicine box, go and get it for me."

He asked Shen Guiwan to get the medicine, but the arms around Shen Guiwan's shoulders were tightly held and would not be loosened.

Shen Guiwan touched the back of Du Zhinian's neck, and put his cheek on the top of his hair. The two of them sat in an awkward position for a while, before Du Zhinian let Shen Guiwan go to get the medicine.

Shen Guiwan dug out two different boxes of stomach medicine in the medicine box, and when he handed it to Du Zhinian, he paid attention to the instructions, and when Du Zhinian was about to take it, he quickly withdrew his hand.

"I want to eat after dinner, have you had dinner?" Shen Guiwan asked while holding the medicine.

"I didn't eat much." Du Zhinian sat on the ground covering his stomach, and snorted uncomfortably, "It doesn't matter if you eat once or twice on an empty stomach."

He is a doctor, so it is reasonable to say that he would not mess around, but Shen Guiwan gave him the medicine, after thinking about it, he said: "I'll cook a bowl of noodles for you, it will be ready in 5 minutes."

After Shen Guiwan finished speaking, he turned and went into the kitchen. Du Zhinian had no strength to stop him, and continued to sit on the ground after swallowing the medicine, waiting for the medicine to take effect slowly to suppress the pain in his stomach.

The sound of bubbling soup and boiling water came from the kitchen, and a faint scent wafted to Du Zhinian.

Shen Guiwan brought the cooked plain noodles to the dining table, took Du Zhinian's arms and helped him sit on the chair.

Du Zhinian became a little sober after taking the medicine. He sat down at the dining table and looked down at the white porcelain bowl in front of him. The thin plain noodles in the bowl were lying in the clear soup, with a few oily spots floating on the edge.

Too plain.Du Zhinian leaned on the edge of the table and wanted to stand up to get the chili sauce in the hanging cabinet, but Shen Guiwan stopped him.

He stood between Du Zhinian and the hanging cabinet, his eyes were darkened, and he seemed a little unhappy.

Du Zhinian drank too much, his head was a little dull, he was in a trance for a while and tried to bargain with Shen Guiwan: "Just put a little chili, I can't eat it without taste."

Shen Guiwan ignored Du Zhinian's negotiation and said calmly, "Did you drink a lot at night?"

His attitude wasn't too tough, and he didn't intend to ask the bottom line. Du Zhinian was silent for a moment, his tired body couldn't support it, and he collapsed on the chair.

"The two departments had a social dinner, and the leader was there, so we had some drinks together." Du Zhinian rubbed his eyes and replied wearily.

In fact, there is more than one point. Some people in the department were determined to fight for wine, and refused to admit defeat in front of the leader. Du Zhinian drank three different kinds of wine at the beginning, and he couldn't remember that he had drunk it by the end of the show. a few cups.

He just felt hot in his stomach, and his throat was burning so badly that he didn't even have time to call for a driver, so he took a taxi back.

Shen Guiwan looked into Du Zhinian's eyes, and sat opposite Du Zhinian after a while.

"Don't eat spicy food if your stomach hurts." He paused, "It will be very uncomfortable."

"Got it." Du Zhinian said lazily, then suddenly laughed again.

"Shen Guiwan, you are in charge of things like this, not like a lover who is kept at home, but rather like a cohabiting lover disciplining others."

He teased casually, Shen Guiwan didn't answer after listening, but silently looked away, lowered his head to stare at the scar on the palm of his right hand.

The blood scab on the scar fell off, but the torn flesh left mottled marks, deeply engraved on Shen Guiwan's palm like an unbearable brand.

Even if the scar fades and the deep pain is forgotten, time still cannot erase the fact that he was injured.

The atmosphere suddenly turned cold, and Du Zhinian realized later that he had said something wrong.

His lips moved, and he didn't know what to say to Shen Guiwan who was silent with his head bowed.

The two sat facing each other, because Du Zhinian teased each other without thinking after drinking.

Although lovers and lovers are doing similar things, but there is a difference of one word, but the status is very different.

The former is something that people can only hide secretly, while the latter can be announced to the world openly.

When Du Zhinian said such words to Shen Guiwan as a lover, it seemed to warn him of his transgression, and also seemed to mock his lowliness.

Shen Guiwan lowered his head and said nothing, Du Zhinian felt uncomfortable looking at it, and wanted to apologize several times, but when the words came to his lips, he hesitated.

Finally, he picked up the chopsticks and stuffed the bowl of half-cold plain noodles into his stomach.