rest of life 22

"I wish to have a heart, and the white head will not be separated." It is not easy to win a heart, and it is even more precious to not be separated when the hair is old. "Falling in love is actually a choice, choose someone you like, and someone who likes you. Then, when you get married, choose each other's family and accept each other's family. Since it is a choice, there will never be only one, choose The opportunities will not be endless." I said to Zhao Han. "Of course, this is at best my personal opinion, which is basically rational. As for whether this is the case in reality, everyone has their own experience. There are many people who are desperate for 'love'. The so-called There are many people who treat 'love' as a game, and even defraud life." This is what I said when I was chatting with Zhao Han one night, and I don't remember why I said it.

"I know! But people always need 'love', and if it's a choice you make, you can't blame others, and you don't regret it. I believe in fate, and I also believe in my own choice." she responded.She is always like this, she is very stubborn when she does things, and it is difficult for her to back down after she has recognized it.

"There is a difference between no regrets and no regrets. No regrets means that there is no regret, no self-blame, or even loss in the heart. But no regrets, but after things happen, regrets have no effect, and you can only pinch your nose. I admit, this is not willing, at most it is forced to help." I expressed my thoughts as if retorting.

"However, even so, so what? Who would have expected that in the future, most of them would only be able to take one step at a time. I don't have the ability to see through people at a glance, otherwise I would be a prophet. I don't believe in any religion, no Dedicate your spirit to the realization of the great God." She said angrily, and seemed to have the feeling of "everything you said is right, but I just don't agree with it!" A fundamental objection, that is, "unreasonable.""It's a girl's privilege," she said.

"Although I said so, if I could see the result already, why bother to go to this flood? Isn't this jumping into the fire by myself?" I continued to say helplessly, but unwillingly.

"How do you know that what you expected must be right? If you don't wade into the flood, how do you know that the water wasn't muddy on purpose, but it's actually not deep at all? As for the fire pit, maybe it's just the view from a distance. The hallucinations that appeared when I was there!" She refuted every sentence of my words, she seemed a little angry, angry at my way of thinking that was too horny, and angry at my stubbornness.

"I dare not say that my prediction is correct. I can only determine a rough probability. In other words, the possibility of that happening is extremely high. As for what you said, most of them are special cases! Generally speaking, a flood is a flood, and a fire pit is a fire pit, so there is no mistake." I continued on my own, even though I could already hear her anger.

"But why am I not a special case?" If she was next to me, I guess she must have said this very loudly.

"Since it is a special case, it must be random, and who can be sure that I am special?" I continued my stubbornness and retorted again.

"But, I like you! This is something I can be sure of." She said this suddenly, her words made me dumbfounded, my heart beat faster, and I didn't know how to deal with it for a while.Therefore, I was silent for a long time.

"But, what counts as liking, what counts as love?" I finally asked a silly question, although it seems that few people really take this question as a question to explore.However, when I suddenly asked it to my heart one day, I found that I didn't know how to answer it.Just like those three seemingly simple propositions in philosophy, it seems that all possible answers are ambiguous and imperfect. "Should I solve this problem before falling in love, or should I re-determine the answer to this question after falling in love?" This incidental question arises again.

"You, how do you ask me to answer what you think in your heart? Don't you know?" She asked back in surprise, as if she was a little confused by my question and didn't know how to deal with it. She was probably thinking, "My God, how can there be such a person in the world!"

"In my heart, I feel that you are very good! I can talk to you intimately and without any scruples, and I can be intimate with you." I replied like this.

"Then, what worries do you have? Like this, don't you like it? Or maybe it's because I'm so popular that everyone can easily contact me. Do you feel moved?" She continued to ask .

"What does it feel like to be moved? I just know that sometimes I really want to talk to you! But, I don't always want to talk to you. It's like, people sometimes need to talk, but I don't like Open up your heart to others, not the kind of person who talks too much. My heart is so chaotic!" My hands trembled a little, and my heart beat faster and faster.It's as if in a very important exam, it's coming to an end, but I still have a few questions to do too late.

"Okay! I can't do anything, I don't know how to explain it to you. Well, give me a hundred days, and after a hundred days, you can make a decision! Is that okay?"

I can't refuse, and I don't know what I think in my heart.It's as if her words aroused the spring in my heart, causing it to ripple layer after layer, and it's hard to calm down ever since.

I asked Zhang Kai that question, and he said, "It depends on whether you want to be nice to her? Also, whether you want to be with her in the future, whether you want to marry her"

I asked Xu Qingyu and Zhou Tao the same question, and their answers were quite different.Then, they rolled their eyes directly, expressing that they felt "different" to me at this age who would still ask such naive questions. "Maybe, their answer is right!" I thought so.

On that day, the weather was fine.Spring, and a warm, sunny day in spring.I took the car and went to her city. "Perhaps I should meet her!"

I think.When I’m in the car, I’m always very quiet, not talking, or sleeping, or taking out my mobile phone and listening to music, while reading some books I’ve downloaded a long time ago.I can't remember what book I read that day, it seems to be Haruki Murakami's "Kafka on the Shore", or David Salinger's "The Catcher in the Rye". There was a child who ran away from home. "This is really not the occasion!" I thought. "Maybe, I should watch "Norwegian Wood." In fact, I hope that my journey will not be peaceful, and it is best to have some anecdotes happen before my eyes, or even if there are one or two stories on the way. People, tell their stories, I can listen to them silently, it is very interesting.Unfortunately, things always backfire.So, I could only read patiently, and when I was tired, I leaned against the chair and the window to sleep.I sometimes stare out the window, watching the passing scenery along the way, but I can't stare for too long, because sometimes I get motion sickness.However, my seat is often by the window.The car was going very fast, and when I woke up, I had already arrived at my destination. "It's already here, I don't know if she has arrived at the station!" I looked at my watch, it was already noon.I didn't eat much for breakfast, and my stomach was already growling with hunger.I got out of the car and walked towards the station entrance amidst the crowds.

Sunlight leaked in from the underground walkway.Walking in the dark underground with only short sleeves on, I instantly felt warm, and the goosebumps on my arms gradually disappeared.The entrance to the station was full of people, and their eyes were full of anxiety. Suddenly, the eyes of one or two people glowed, as if they were very excited, and they seemed to be more anxious. I knew that they had found it. The target to wait for.I looked at those people from a distance, looking for her from the pile of looking heads.Suddenly, I saw a little head struggling in the crowd, she got in through the cluster with difficulty, and then looked eagerly towards my direction.She was wearing a pink dress, her bangs were combed to the brow, and her long hair hung straight on her shoulders.She is tall and of medium build.I smiled and walked towards her calmly.

"Have you been waiting for a long time?" I took her hand and asked softly.

"Soon, I just arrived too! Fortunately, I didn't take the wrong bus today, otherwise I would miss it." She replied happily, smiling.

"Oh? It seems that you often take anti-buses." I asked meaningfully.

"Ah, that's right! It's annoying, and I only find out after sitting for many stops." She shook her hand and said pretending to be angry.

"Actually, I often sit backwards. I remember one time, I simply sat straight to the terminal. But I have learned a lesson. Since then, I have always been very cautious before riding a car." I said with a smile. "On this point, it seems that we are very similar! As a boy, I don't know the way, so I'm really ashamed to say it!"

"Are you hungry? Or, I'll cook for you" she asked with concern.Then he made a tempting offer that was hard to refuse.

"Okay! Just try your handicraft." I glanced at her and said with a smile.

It was very hot, especially after noon.The palms of the hands were already slippery, especially those two hands holding together.None of us let up, though.

"How are you satisfied?" She asked suddenly.

"What are you satisfied with? Oh! Today's attire is very nice and fresh." I replied pretending to be puzzled.

"Of course, I took a lot of effort to tidy up. 'Women are the ones who please themselves', so I naturally need to dress up. Haha!" She continued without paying attention.

She cooks quickly and skillfully.In less than four and ten minutes, she had already cooked rice, a sweet and sour pork ribs, a coke chicken wing, and a dish of cold dishes.She rarely eats, "Why do you eat so little, it's like a chicken pecking at rice." I said with a smile.So, almost all those dishes belonged to me, and they all fell into my stomach after a while.

We walked a lot that afternoon and talked a lot, as if two friends who hadn't seen each other for a long time wanted to tell each other their experiences for many years in one breath.We have never met, but we have known each other for a long time.We are friends, but not friends.Because of the holiday, there are many people on the road, disturbing and coming and going.It's just that they all seem to be a foil, and they all just set off the small world formed by the two of us.Peaceful, peaceful, arbitrary, free, even warm.

Two days later, I got into the car again, but the direction of the car was opposite.She walked me to the station, and after a hug, she waved gently until I disappeared around the corner of the station.

"What do you think we look like?" I asked seriously.

"It seems that they are friends or relatives!" She replied seriously.

"Hmm! Or maybe it's because we know each other too well! After all, we talk about everything. Sometimes, it doesn't feel good to not have a sense of mystery! Haha." I said jokingly.

"That makes sense!" She nodded in agreement.

"Then, what's our relationship now?" She frowned and asked.

"Hmm...or, a very close friend" I pondered for a moment, then tentatively replied.

"Hmm! Maybe, yes." She said disappointedly.Suddenly, she seemed to think of something very happy. "Boyfriend! Haha." She whispered to herself. "I seem to be only suitable for being friends with others. Why do so many people only be my friends? Helpless!" She stomped her feet angrily, shook her head, and said to herself.

"Haha, isn't it great to have a lot of friends?" I looked at her with a smile and comforted me.

"It seems to be oh but, I don't want so many male friends, I want a boyfriend!" She suddenly said in a serious and decisive manner.As he said that, he clenched his fists vigorously, as if he wanted to work hard or struggle for something.

"You will be the memory of my life! I will never forget you." She swore.

"Oh? Then, I hope that you won't be left with bad impressions and bad memories. However, I will always remember you, and I will remember these two days!" I said seriously.

"Bad guy! Haha." She suddenly said strangely.

"Haha!" I laughed out loud, very relaxed and comfortable.

In the car, I thought a lot, until finally I fell into a deep sleep.I had a dream in which she read a little poem I wrote:

the sun shines through the blue

There is no end in sight

horse chasing sheep

i hold you

follow the eagle's trail

the grass that covers the ground

Wild boar cubs line up

I see

the mountain behind the mountain

i hold you

listen to wolf

Togetherness under the moon

......

"Why do people always ignore some people who are good to them, or always inadvertently hurt some people who care about them? Why do people always treat strangers and those who have nothing to do with them People are full of smiles, but they don’t pretend, have a cold attitude, or even speak harshly towards those who are fond of themselves and who are sincere to themselves?" I suddenly thought of this question, which I have been thinking about, but it is hard to think of it. Questions with perfect answers.

"Maybe some people can't get anything from the people they live with. They expose the emptiness of their hearts and always feel that they are being severely criticized by others behind their backs; but they feel very sorry for the compliments they don't get. Needs, or advantages that they don't have at all, try to show they have; so they hope to win the respect or affection of strangers, regardless of whether they will fail in the future. Some people are born snobbish, and they are absolutely inconvenient to friends or close people. Because that is their obligation, it is better to serve strangers, which can satisfy their self-esteem; so the closer they are to them in the emotional circle, the less they love them, and the farther away they are, the more attentive they are.” ", this passage may answer my questions. "Am I?" I asked myself. "Shouldn't it be!" I replied silently in my heart.

The days go by quickly, no matter the joy or the pain, they gradually disappear with the passage of time.It was as if it had never appeared before, and even, in the end, there was not even a trace left. "What a year of failure!" I exclaimed.Only memory, this non-physical thing, can be vaguely and faintly retained in the mind.Then, people like me, at a certain time, in retrospect, finally come to such an evaluation or emotion.In the end, like a bird flying across the sky, everything will eventually return to nothingness and indifference.