[Short story] I am not a cat

41.

"By the way, Meng Huan, you haven't gone to the toilet today, won't you panic?"

"Meow?"

"Don't get on my bed while I'm sleeping."

"Meow woo woo—"

42.

Who~ sent you to my side~

That's it~ the bright moon and the bright moon~

It's one of the great blessings in life to be able to see a cat first thing in the morning, provided it doesn't step on my face.

Well, even if it stepped on my face, it would be a great blessing!

Is it done?Is it done!

As a senior cat owner, I didn't suffer from insomnia on the first night I had a cat. It was really irresponsible. I regret for a minute.

43.

Well, 1 minute is up, today is another day with cats!

"Good morning, master, let's get to know each other formally. From today onwards, I will be your shit-shoveling officer. My name is Chen Yuyao. Please give me your advice. Come shake hands."

I smiled and grabbed Meng Tuo's right front paw and shook it twice, which means that the two sides have reached a consensus, and the two countries have formally established diplomatic relations since then.

44.

Today I’m going to take Meng Huo to the pet store to have a look, cat litter, cat scratching boards, etc. Do you want to buy another house for it to live in... But my cat seems to be different from ordinary cats, let’s see how it behaves then.

With yesterday's experience, now I have figured out what this cat owner eats.The answer is - it eats whatever I eat, and I can give it whatever I can't eat.

Anyway, it is different from ordinary cats.

45.

I am in heaven again.

"Hey Kitty, you are beautiful again, little beauty." This is a puppet cat.

"Ah, the king, the king has eaten very well recently and has gained weight again." This is a fat orange.

"Look at me Huihui, don't hide in it." This is a Russian blue cat.

"Hey, hey, Mimi, don't catch me, what's the matter with being so skinny today?" This is a Meng Piao.

"Okay, okay, I'm sorry, I know I'm wrong, I shouldn't be eating what's in the bowl and looking at what's in the pot. I shouldn't be messing with other cats outside when I have a cat at home. I was wrong." I looked at Meng. The circle of fur that exploded on his tail stroked its back reassuringly, whether it was shyness or jealousy.

If it's jealousy, what about at least five vows in my bachelor apartment that can't be less?

46.

"It's Xiaoyao, and brought Meng Pao to buy things again?"

"Yes, sister Liu, thank you for your hard work." I smiled and nodded.

Also, Meng Tu, sure enough, people who know me have already rationalized Meng Tu's existence.How strange.

"I heard your mother tell me that your father threw away the litter box the day before yesterday, and it seems that you need to buy a new one."

"Yeah...hahaha..." Fuck it, biological parents, you are really mine!Is it too embarrassing?Don't show your family ugliness?

47.

"Look, cat litter box, what color do you like?" I put Meng Piao on the floor and let it fly freely.

"Oh, blue. Good enough for a man." I nodded approvingly. "Anything more? A cat scratcher, cat litter, cat climbing frame?"

It wandered around for a while, shaking its head to the left and waving its paws to the right. It didn't know what was going on in its little head, and finally ordered a cat climbing frame with a small nest.The kind you see in cat cafes.

48.

Oh, by the way, speaking of cat cafes... With my master's pissing nature, will I never be able to go there in the future?

Then my membership card...

Gan Lin is cool!I said that you should not apply for a card, you should not apply for a card!Damn the boss is trying to fool me, I really smell good!

It's so sweet to fuck you!

How about going secretly in the future...the flowers inside are still super cute...

Pooh!What am I thinking!

Chen Yuyao!I am so disappointed in you!

What's the difference between you and a married man who puts his gentle and lovely wife at home and goes out with a girly wife!

Too disappointed!

49.

"Meow?" Meng Tuo tugged at my trouser leg, obviously realizing that I was distracted.I really hope my Holmes doesn't know what I was thinking just now, otherwise I may never be able to do shameful things with him for the rest of my life.

Embarrassment?

Like hugging and sucking or it licking me...?

what are you thinking about!

Am I that kind of person? !

You are humiliating me!I sue you for violating the right of reputation!

【Meng Tu: But I'm that kind of cat. 】

50.

Meng Huo motioned for me to put the cat climbing frame next to the table, which was very close to my bed and the table.

What are you trying to do?Assault on me?

fine!Don't worry!come here!Hit me in the heart!Shoot me in the heart!

"Meow——" Meng Tu watched me finally finish moving, let out a satisfied cry, got up and was about to climb up.

"Wait a minute." I suddenly took out a... a name tag with a bell from my pocket, which I took from the counter when I just checked out.So I took out a pen from my bag and wrote neatly on it: Chen Yuyao 138XXXXXXXX.

I sat on the bed and patted my legs, and Meng Hu jumped up spiritually.

"I'll tie it around your neck so that you won't get lost in the future." I stroked its soft and smooth fur, "Otherwise I'd be so sad."

The sun is setting and the sky is full of red clouds.

In the sunlight, Meng Tu got up and picked up my clothes and licked my face.

51.

Meng Tu is really not a cat.First, it's smart.

For example, I taught it how to use cat litter once and it became proficient. For example, it knows that it can communicate with me by making different types of calls at different times. For example, it often looks at me with contempt ;

Secondly, its origin is unknown and it eats everything, and it can be rationalized;

In the end, it is too noble and beautiful, and it is simply a master of cats.

Doesn't the last point count?Why not?The last point is the most convincing, okay?

Although I always feel that all this is unusual, but where can it be outrageous? After all, can it become a person?

So, the future is long, so let him go.

52.

I've been obsessed with taking pictures lately.

If you look at the summary table of my mobile phone usage, you will find that the proportion of my camera is as high as 80.00%.

ah?No no, although I know I'm handsome but I don't take selfies.I was taking pictures of my master.

Yesterday, I picked out one of the [-] photos that I thought was the cutest and sent it to my brother, but he replied with six words: the cat is good, but you are not.

I:? ? ? ? ? ?

You can say that I am not good, but how can you say that cats are good?Is it just good? ? ? ?

Keep your titanium dog eyes open!Meng Hu is perfect! PERFECT! EXCELLENT! AWESOME!

Although I'm so slanderous, but since my brother said so, he has his way, so I'm going to ask for advice humbly.

Me: Why can't I do it? [Down like a stream.jpg]

He: Please use the bX12 skillfully to stop shooting straight men. [What's wrong with the straight male panda head, drink hot water.jpg]

So the next day, the most used software on my mobile phone became bX12.

53.

Hey, don't say that I jio got this bX12 is really easy to use, look at this filter, a kind of noble style will come out.

So today, on a whim, I opened my barren and barren circle of friends, and posted a photo without my brothers checking and reviewing it.

This is a freshly released photo of Meng Tuo standing on the window sill looking up at the moon.The moonlight is soft but bright, and its sapphire-like eyes reflect the light of the day.I thought about it, and added the text "The moonlight is beautiful tonight".

I have a lot of people in Riga on WeChat, but because I basically don't chat, I usually don't have much news.I didn't take it seriously after I finished posting it. I was even taken aback when I saw the red 99+ in the upper right corner of the green icon after I got out of the shower. Then I realized that it was because I posted a circle of friends.

54.

I was sitting on the edge of the bed and was about to click on WeChat when Meng Huo suddenly ran over with delicate kitten steps, and the bell around his neck made a cheerful melody.

I saw that it ran to my feet and stopped moving, so it looked at me with those bright eyes. The phone that prompted the new message reached out and hugged it to his lap.

"Meow--" it rubbed against me, making a coquettish cry.

I lowered my head and scratched the top of its head, "What's the matter, my little master? You just ate, and you can't eat any more today."

It shook its head, indicating that it didn't mean that, and then licked its paw.

I looked at its saliva-soaked white fur and was still a little puzzled. I was just about to ask it, but it caught off guard and licked the drops of water on my neck that hadn't been wiped off.

The small natural barb on the cat's tongue made me itchy, and I immediately reflexively opened it with one hand and touched the neck with the other.

"Say hello to me next time you sneak attack! It's so itchy." I rubbed my neck as if it was playing with me, and took it back.It wagged its tail and looked at me innocently, with a pitiful meow.

"Oh... do you want to take a bath?" I suddenly realized.

"Meow!" It was happy.

55.

I carried Meng into the bathroom, filled the basin with warm water and put it in.

Meng Tu didn't struggle at all, and rolled in a circle consciously after entering the water, completely without the self-consciousness that a cat should be afraid of water.

Meng Tiao, whose hair was wet, lost the usual plush bonus, and his cuteness declined.But it also enhances its elegance because of its slender figure.

In the name of righteous bath lotion, I started playing hooligans righteously.

"Meng Tiao, your legs are so long, longer than any other cat I've ever seen."

"Meow~" cried proudly.

"Meng Tuo, you have covered your powder well, I want to wash it for you."

"Meow?" asked a suspicious voice.

"Meng Tuo, your little Chic Chic looks very interesting, although you haven't entered estrus yet."

"Meow!" cried angrily.

"Hey, are you angry? Why are you angry? Oh, don't worry, I will definitely not take you to be neutered. Since it is a little male cat, it should go wild. Dad knows it. Just don't mess up other little female cats too much. Pain, understand? To be a cat, you have to know when enough is enough."

"Meow!" The cry was a bit hoarse and rough, and Meng Tuo seemed to be really angry, and started to splash in the water, which wet a large piece of my recently changed pants.

"Look at you! Don't move! It's okay, I won't talk anymore! Don't move! Flush the water immediately." I said helplessly.

The war is finally over, if the water when it shakes its fur is solid, then I'm already riddled with holes.

56.

Finally got Meng Tiao settled down, he lay down next to my pillow and began to squint his eyes.Only then did I remember the cell phone that I had just ruthlessly discarded, so I fumbled around for a while before finally holding it in my hand.

I click on WeChat, then on Moments, and then on my news.I thought these would be high praises for my photography and my cat, but I didn't expect it to be all "9999999999999", and some people gossipingly asked who it was below.

I:? ? ? ? ?

I just want to show off my little cutie?Can Meng Huo and I go 999?

57.

I sighed and dragged down, and finally a comment about my cat jumped into my eyes: "Brother Yao, is this your cat! You are too cute! You can even be a cute pet blogger! prprprprp."

I took a look at this person's name, Huang Yan, I'm not familiar with it, male or female?But no matter what, I was very satisfied, and even a little moved by his or her suggestion, so I replied: "Thank you, I also think my baby is super cute."

Suddenly, an ominous premonition hit me, and I swiped left to switch back to the chat interface.Sure enough, a bunch of people were asking me about my girlfriend's background, and some of them suddenly took the opportunity to confess their love to me, which made me inexplicably terrified.So I hurriedly left a comment under the circle of friends: "Thank you for your concern and blessings, but I have no intention of someone, but the family pet is too cute, I want to share it with everyone. Maybe the word matching is not suitable for everyone to misunderstand. I am really sorry !"

I seemed to see the eyes they cast on me after seeing the news, which contained "you have deceived my feelings", and I couldn't help pressing my forehead.

But what makes me even more distressed is, why don't they praise my cat as cute?

[Meng Hu: Because they thought I was an Internet celebrity, and the pictures and texts had nothing to do. 】

58.

It was night, Meng Hu's breathing was even and strong beside me, and I tossed and turned.

Not for anything else, just for the suggestion that moved my heart today, and the more I thought about it, the more my heart became more and more excited, and my heart was beating loudly.

Once, I was also a part of the cat-sucking army on Weibo, wandering among all kinds of cute pet big V, knowing that this is a life-saving medicine for cat-free cat slaves, so I am especially grateful to those shit-shoveling officers who provided videos and pictures them.Now that I have a cat, I should know how to repay kindness, and sprinkle the seeds of love and cuteness to more withered hearts!

Damn, don't praise me, I'm not that noble, in fact, I just want you to see my lovely Meng Chula.

Just do what I said, I picked up my phone, changed my Weibo name that I can only change once a year to "Yu Yao and Meng Hu's daily life", and then started thinking about what I would like to shoot for Xiaodong tomorrow.

In the dark, my smile gradually became ghostly in a faint fluorescent light.

59.

"Meng Tiao, come on, I'll make a video for you today." The next day, I sat on a chair lovingly watching Meng Tiao eat the last piece of chicken in the box.

"Meow meow meow!" Meng Tu didn't know if he felt something. Not only did he follow me disobediently today, but he also jumped a few steps back, and the hair on his tail stood up a little bit.

I coaxed and lied, "Come on, I have something interesting for you to see."

"Meow?" It tilted its head, doubtful.

Alas, so it is not good to say that cats are too smart.

I had no choice but to take a few steps forward and reach out to grab it into my arms. It reflexively wanted to catch me, but I dodged it deftly.

"Hey, Dad will take you today..." I stroked the two tufts of hair on its head and smiled evilly, "Record an emoji."

60.

"Meow!" Very good, Meng Tu resisted fiercely, but I still managed to put this green hat on it!No, it's a frog hat!

"Come on, walk around obediently, look at the camera, and turn your head around." I tried to tempt.

"Hey, it's so awkward, don't shake your head, just move slowly a few times."

"Look at the camera! Be innocent and cute! Aren't you usually very good at acting?"

"Just two seconds! After the filming, I will add chicken legs tonight! Otherwise, I will get a bento!"

"Fuck, do you even understand what it means to get a bento? No, no, how could I be willing to let you get a bento, just kidding."

"Okay, come on, one or two..."

I finally took a picture that turned out to be pretty good. Meng Tu's blue eyes were watery, full of unwillingness and anxiety.

"Hey, bX12 is really good, and it can also make animated emoji packs... This emoji pack matches the words...you...give...my...hat...so...warm...friendly."