nib boy

When Yao Lu and Ning Ziyue entered the ward, Xie Zhe was already gone.Bai Yuze leaned against the head of the bed in a daze, and was called several times before he woke up.

The matter was too complicated, and now facing them, he didn't know where to start.Fortunately, the two people beside the bed had enough patience and calmness compared to before, and when he was a little confused to connect the cause and effect, the information had almost been digested.

"You..." The silence in the room only lasted for a moment, Yao Lu's expression was complicated, and he hesitated to speak.Seeing this, Ning Ziyue took up the conversation calmly: "Are you really going to leave? Is there no other way?"

Bai Yuze shook his head dejectedly. "If possible... I don't want to leave either."

"Does Xie Zhe know about this matter?" Yao Lu frowned, as if she couldn't open any pot.

"I just told him... After listening, he left without saying a word." The young man moved his body restlessly, his eyes filled with shame. "Although I have made mental preparations before, I didn't expect his reaction to be so big. After all, we have been together since we were young. In his opinion, this is probably the same as betrayal..."

"...It's not just a question of betrayal. Idiot." Rubbing his temples with a headache, Yao Lu felt that his life was simply the biggest farce in history, and he didn't even have a normal-thinking person around him. "Okay, you should have a good rest. We will coax him for you when we get back to school. Where is Fir Shan's ward?"

"Just next to it. 306."

He told him a few more words about his injury, and after learning that he would be discharged from the hospital in five days, the two got up and went out.

"Things around me are so fucking evil recently. Why are these boys so eager to leave quickly, they don't even have a conscience. Mom, I'm very hurt, hey." Yao Lu stood outside the next ward and stared through the glass. The boy who was resting on the bed with his eyes closed put his pants pockets on and complained.The people sitting in the next row of chairs did not move.

He subconsciously turned his face to the side, saw that his quiet brows were full of loneliness, and only then did he react.All of this is not just for him alone.

Many years ago, Ning Ziyue also stood alone on the cliff with his pockets in his pocket, watching the infinitely falling blue sky, black and red lava surging in his chest.

He thought he probably wasn't strong enough.

It's just a person who likes to put his hands in his trouser pockets to watch all the joys and sorrows, with an expressionless face but a piercing heart.

"When Su Yang left, his legs were almost not healed at all. He was holding on all the time, but I knew it." Ning Ziyue said slowly and in a low voice, as if he was talking to himself. "I no longer have the ability to continue to keep him behind, so I don't want to keep him. Now I have nothing, that's okay. In this way, there won't be a second Lin Yan, a second Lin Ran..."

"...It's not alone, you." Yao Lu remained indifferent, there was nothing he could do, the more he wanted to escape, the more he would not allow him to do so. "Even if they all leave one by one, I will still stand here—the place you can see when you turn around."

He had already looked away when he said this, so he didn't see—

Hearing this, Ning Ziyue closed his eyes in the shadow of the wall, and shook his head slightly heartbroken.

Three days later, Leng Shan and Bai Yuze went through the discharge procedures step by step.Before leaving, he promised to go back to school to attend classes honestly, and the two of them would make plans after Bai Yuze was discharged from the hospital.

But after he walked out of the hospital gate with his things, he didn't rush back to school first.I squeezed sideways into an overcrowded bus on the side of the road, and arrived at my destination within a few stops.

Looking up slightly under the steps, two young nurses at the front desk are chatting through the glass door, and behind them is a wall full of medicine shelves.

When he sang in the bar before, he also met some people of the same rank and low, and Leng Shan remembered who told him that the only small clinic on this street had a very hard backstage, and it had been quietly carrying out illegal clinical medicine trials. .As long as you are willing to sign an informed consent form with them to test the drug yourself, payment is by no means a problem.

It was a dangerous deal, but he had to take the risk.Considering the planned future, what the two of them urgently need now is money.Even though Bai Yuze's parents have paid all the medical expenses for them before, who knows what difficulties and obstacles will be waiting for them in the wandering distance.

He doesn't care if he has to suffer.But he can't just watch his lover who has abandoned everything because of trust in him, and suffers with him.He is reluctant.

Finally, he took a deep breath, and the young man's expression became a little more determined. He was about to step up the stone steps, but unexpectedly a strong wind came from the side, and despite his quick movements, he was still rubbed against his face by his fist.

The first reaction that popped up in my mind was that it was bad. Has Jin Huizhi sent someone here to seek revenge? !So he didn't even care about the burning pain on his face, before he even had time to look at the face of the visitor, he relentlessly twisted the sneaking arm, bowed and threw the most ruthless over-the-shoulder throw in his life.However, he didn't expect that the man would also change his moves quickly, grabbing his lapel clothes and refusing to let go. As a result, the two of them ended up entangled with their limbs, stumbled on the hard steps and rolled down, almost out of their bodies. up.

"...Fuck, Fir Shan, what the hell are you doing!! I just touched you lightly, and I hit you so hard!" Xie Zhe sat up from the ground with his hands on his back, baring his teeth, his eyes wishing to see the person in front of him Eat it alive.

Leng Shan fixed her eyes on him, and all her surprise and panic turned into raging anger. With an extremely cold expression, she pushed him to the ground again with one hand, and the red marks on her cheeks were particularly obvious. "...What? 'Just a little touch'?"

"Uh..." A certain Zhe, who obviously felt wronged, paused for a while, and soon became fierce again. He pointed at the building standing in front of him with one hand, and said in a stern voice: "You think I don't know what you are doing in that ghost place? Once the medicine comes out What a mistake and your life is gone! When will you bastard learn not to hide from others to make decisions? What do you think of yourself?!"

"...It has nothing to do with you." The man didn't even look at him, he patted the dust off his body and stood up, with a calm and hateful tone. "You go. It's almost time for class."

Xie Zhe was finally out of anger, and reached out to violently lift his shoulder: "You're going to die, I'm going to give you a fucking lesson!!" Seeing this, Leng Shan became really angry, and turned around to give him some Try it hard, suddenly a heavy envelope crashed into his arms, he subconsciously stretched out his hand to catch it, and then lost his mind. "you……?"

"...not much. 3000 yuan—I'll borrow it from you." The young man slowly lit a cigarette, the smoke curling up and blurring his expression. "Remember, Fir. You have to pay back what you owe me..."

"I do not……"

"Do you dare to try it. I will call Bai immediately and report to him your heroic deeds today."

Fir Shan pinched the envelope with downcast eyes, and remained silent.

Xie Zhe didn't say anything more, he kept smoking the cigarette quietly, and then said flatly: "He will be discharged from the hospital the day after tomorrow. There will be a farewell performance by the band at the school at [-] o'clock in the evening. You will come."

The other party still didn't make a sound, I don't know whether it was acquiescing or refusing.

This summer is really too long.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Two days later.

In the evening, Leng Shan went to the hospital alone to pick up Bai Yuze, first went downstairs to go through the discharge procedures, and then came back to pack things with him.

In the ward, the rustling sound of the two people folding their clothes could be clearly heard. The twilight outside the window had gradually faded from the sky, and the white gauze curtain was blown away by the breeze, leaving only the coolness like a lake.

For some reason, neither of them wanted to speak at this moment.It was worth celebrating, firstly, both of them have recovered smoothly, and secondly, they will soon be able to leave this land of long nights and dreams together, and many thoughts have been cut off.

Have you ever felt like this.Ending a final exam is like finishing a battle, the eve of a long-awaited trip, or an official reunion with a long-lost friend.If you are too surprised, you will suddenly calm down, maybe with a little uneasiness, and your steps will become hesitant when you are about to step forward.

It suddenly occurred to me that there are still so many things that you can't let go of, so you can't let go of them completely and enjoy them with peace of mind.

"The train ticket has been bought. Tomorrow morning at nine o'clock." After a long silence, Leng Shan zipped up the bag at his feet, straightened up and said this. "Go to Suzhou, can I?"

Bai Yuze's gaze stayed on his face for a few seconds, and he nodded. "...Well. I have no problem."

"Is it really okay? Just leave like this." Fir Shan looked at the silhouette of the young man sitting quietly by the window, under the outline of the dusk, it was really beautiful and pale.So he pretended to be relaxed and raised his hand to rub the other party's hair, and said softly: "If you repent, there is still time."

The boy gave him a comforting smile, then shook his head. "I don't regret it, I'm just a little bit reluctant. At least before I leave, I want to remember what I have now." As he spoke, he picked up his cloth bag and stood up, his smile contained a bit of regret no matter how you looked at it.

"Next, where do we go?"

When the taxi stopped at the school gate, the sky was already dim, and even if they were very close, they could hardly see each other's faces clearly.

The main entrance was locked tightly as expected, and the two of them walked around to the back of the wall familiarly, and turned inside one by one.However, Leng Shan didn't mean to send Bai Yuze back to the dormitory, but led him straight to the north building.

"Xiao Shan?" He called out to him from behind, "Where are you taking me?"

"You'll know when you go." The other party responded briefly, with an irresistible force in his hand.Bai Yuze shut his mouth obediently when he heard the words, and followed him through the quiet dormitory area in the dusk.

The North Building is considered to be the oldest building in the entire campus. Although it is indeed tall enough, its corner is relatively remote.They dared to openly occupy the rehearsal classroom on the top floor because there were few people coming and going.However, the small rehearsal room is not their destination tonight.

With the help of Fir Shan, Bai Yuze climbed up the ladder to the roof of the North Building. As soon as he wiped his sweat and raised his head, he was shocked by the sight in front of him.

Those familiar figures with their backs to him turned around as if they had been waiting for a long time after hearing the movement, and everyone's eyes looking at him were as bright as stars.They silently made a way out of the middle, and then Bai Yuze saw the old drum set that should have been left in the rehearsal room, his own broken acoustic guitar, and the bass that was polished to a sparkle, and quietly propped aside black and white keyboard.

"Yo~ Today is really a commemorative day."

Yao Lu put the Mike in his hand on the stand where the lead singer was, and smiled at him. "We stole these microphones from the radio room, so the whole school can hear them later."

Bai Yuze froze in place unable to speak, many thoughts kept appearing and disappearing, making his head buzzing.At this time, Fir Shan, who had climbed up to the roof behind him, gave him a slight push from behind, and said in a low voice, "Go."

It was a midsummer night on the campus. They stood on the vacant roof on the top floor, blowing the gentle breeze before the summer night, watching the city gradually being enveloped by night.The neon lights have not yet been illuminated in a dignified manner, and the street lights are also silently and quietly stuck in the gradual darkness. Everything is poured into the silence of the night with an eroded trend. Like this era, it is full of uneasiness.

When the five people finally used their voices at the same time to outline themselves who had merged into the muted darkness, the clock just reached eight o'clock in the evening.In an instant, the street lights lit up from under their feet, lined up one by one and extended to the street city, pointing directly at the trembling neon buildings.It is replacing the sun, using all its energy to resist the oppression of the night.

However, it's not just that.

The dormitory buildings in front of them seemed to be awakened from a deep sleep suddenly by someone, and the warm yellow lights that they were all too familiar with were projected from the dark windows, bit by bit, filling the eyes, until it spread into a bright ocean.

This is the unique Wanjia lights ten miles foreign market at night in Z.

Weak but full of strength.

They knew that countless eyes were hidden behind the night and lights, listening and looking forward to it, so they became more and more indulgent, carnival, and roared endlessly.My throat became hoarse, so I took a sip of wine and sang again.If the vision is blurred, just wipe it indiscriminately.

During this period, Bai Yuze felt the pain of friction gradually coming from his fingertips, probably because he was cut by the strings, but he continued to play and sing crazily as if he didn't realize it, and when he became intoxicated, tears were already flowing wantonly on his face.He thought that he was leaving tomorrow, maybe he would never come back here again, maybe he would never meet the group of people around him again.The train is heading to the next station where it used to be just a passing moment.That was an ending thousands of times more terrifying than forgetting.

He once walked in the wilderness, and found a small pot of wine in a backpack that was discarded by someone.He thought it was water, and drank it happily.At that time he had nothing, had nothing to lose.There is only room for him in the vast world.

Later, the number of people who drank with him increased, and the faces appeared and faded in a revolving door, so fast that it was too late to recall.He hooked his shoulders with them and sang loudly, through the sky full of stars or the clouds, the noisy summer or the silent winter.

The singing could no longer hide the choked sobs, and it turned out that he was not the only one who shed tears.

The night gradually deepened.

Xie Zhe staggered forward and pushed Leng Shan away from the lead singer's seat, probably because he drank too much and was in a mess of tears.Fortunately, the consciousness is still clear.

"The last song... I will come alone."

Of course he knew that he was not only out of tune, but also lost his way.But some words, some decisions, really still have to be expressed in person.

During the interval between the sound of the prelude, the young man's gaze remained silently on the edge of the roof.He recalled that day two years ago, he was caught off guard by a call from Bai Yuze, but the other party hung up hastily before reporting his location.He hurried to the school by bicycle in a panic, but just in time he saw that person falling from the roof of the building like a kite with broken wings, and the world was flooded by darkness ever since.

I can't hear the sound of flowers blooming, only see your fall.I forgot all the truth about the past, but filled the memory clearly in my impression.

Forget everything, it doesn't matter, I will accompany you; if you lose your support, it doesn't matter, I will accompany you.But this time, when you finally groped for the exit of the huge labyrinth, when you were finally able to fly away with the person who was supposed to be happy together, I also lost all the reasons for not wanting to let go.

Do you know why secret love is painful and humble?

Because he is silently lining up in your heart, but you will always be the number one in his heart. ...

"This smile, with all my aching strength;

This time I am relieved, exhausting the space I remember;

This farewell, exhaust my courage to love you;

This time I'll really cry, with all the expressions I love you;

Because this is the last time I love you. "

When he bowed to take the curtain call under the night sky, he had tears in his eyes, but when he raised his head, he still grinned silly.

He thought, just this time today, it shouldn't be considered embarrassing.

After all, to cry for an unrealized life is to truly live.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

When it was close to midnight, seeing that the two boxes of beer were almost drunk by them, Bai Yuze stood up and wiped his still red eyes, saying that he would go back to the dormitory to pack his things.

"I'll go with you." Leng Shan said and got up, but was rejected by the other party.

"It's okay. You stay and help them move all the instruments down. It will be bad if the administrator finds out tomorrow."

After he said that, Leng Shan could only nod in agreement.Xie Zhe over there disappeared at some point, and Yao Lu just threw the rolled beer cans into the trash bag, and was about to carry his keyboard.

"Let me do it." Ning Ziyue just went down and played the drum and came back, seeing this, stopped him, and raised his hand to take the things.

"Then be careful." Yao Lu nodded, idly returning to the iron net to enjoy the cool breeze, feeling a lot clearer.

At this time, there were only him and Fir Shan on the roof, and the paralyzed man was standing on the other side of the roof smoking a cigarette, quietly staring at the night, wondering what he was thinking.

"...Hey. I told you in advance that I have to go to class tomorrow, but I won't ask for leave to see you off."

The other party unexpectedly didn't complain, but nodded slightly with a cigarette in his mouth. "Got it. I'll pass it on to him."

Yao Lu gritted his teeth as if he had punched cotton. "You guy, you still deserve a beating..."

"Forget it. I'm leaving soon, I'm not in the mood to fight you."

"Bastard! You can't fight if you're in the mood! You'll be a teacher for a day and a father for life, don't you understand?!"

"It's so windy I can't hear you."

"you……!"

Leng Shan waited leisurely for the moment when the other party grabbed her neckline in a fit of frustration, but she didn't expect that after a long time, Yao Lu could only choke out angrily, "Is there any smoke left?"

Generously throwing the whole box over, Yao Lu shook out one and put it in his mouth, murmuring in a low voice indistinctly: "Stinky boy, I will smoke another one with you at the end..."

He searched for the lighter but couldn't find it, so he suddenly leaned in front of him, lit it with the almost burnt smoke on the lips of the fir tree, and then smiled smokyly at a short distance from him.

"What are you nervous about?"

"...I didn't." Leng Shan's back was stiff, and she wanted to back away, but she couldn't move.The pose made him unnatural.

Yao Lu narrowed his eyes slightly. "Forget it, it's up to you to argue." He finally opened a little distance, and began to puff.

"Actually, no matter which one is here today, I have known you, and I have lived until now. If you want to leave, I will not stop, but I will not send it off. It is too cruel to watch brothers being taken farther and farther by the train. .”

Hearing the words, Leng Shan was silent for a while, and finally sighed silently, put one hand on his shoulder, and pressed it gently.

"……I know."

In a corner of the rooftop, Ning Ziyue, who had half of his body protruding from the skylight, squeezed his fist with prominent veins with all his strength, but in the next second, he just quietly returned the same way.

He wasn't sure what he had bumped into just now.

Under the darkness of night, the overlapping figures, the ambiguous distance, and the moment when they got closer because of borrowing the fire, from his perspective, it seemed like they were kissing.

Later, Yao Lu was probably about to get up, but that person pressed his shoulder again, and whispered something in his ear with a sad face.

Is it a final farewell—in this way...? !

He walked faster and faster in the deep corridor, but he didn't know where he was going, and his chest was almost suffocated.

"...It's not alone, you."

"Even if they all leave one by one, I will still stand here—the place you can see when you turn around."

What that person had said suddenly sounded in the back of his mind, he stopped in his tracks, and then a self-deprecating and indifferent arc was drawn from the corner of his mouth, feeling that he was simply stupid.

The phone vibrated without warning, and he picked it up blankly. It was a completely unfamiliar number.

"……Hey."

"..." There was silence on the other end of the phone for a moment, and then the man's gentle and nice chuckle slowly came.

"Ziyue, it's me..."

The author has something to say: