nib boy

At the train station the next morning, Chen Ye was the only one who saw him off.

Bai Yuze waited and waited guiltily. He still had a lot to say, but he never waited for the friend who had been by his side for more than ten years.

When he returned to the dormitory last night, he found that the things he and Leng Shan had left at Xie Zhe's house when they were staying overnight had been neatly packed and placed in the corner, without even thinking about who made them.

Even so... in the end, don't you want to see me again?

Seeing his gloomy eyes, Leng Shan couldn't bear to wrap his arms around his shoulders, and urged softly: "...the train is about to start."

The conductor had already started to drive away the relatives who came to see him off in the safety line. Seeing this, Chen Ye wiped the corners of his red eyes, and tried to show them a big smile while stepping back. "Goodbye. No matter what happens in the future, you will be happy."

"Well. We will contact you when things settle down." Leng Shan slightly nodded, and then gave a menacing look at the conductor next to him who was trying to interrupt their conversation.

It was then that Bai Yuze suddenly remembered something, and hastily found a note from his body and handed it over. "This is the new number of me and Xiaoshan, please pass it to Xie Zhe. That guy... I will leave it to you in the future."

"No problem." Chen Ye agreed with a smile, but in his heart he complained that he would not let me manipulate him.

After explaining everything that should be explained, the train finally started slowly.The pretendingly relaxed smiling faces of the two people at the window gradually faded away, and Chen Ye trotted after the train for a while, only to find that he was already sobbing when he stopped.

In fact, they are also confused about their future.It's just that once the steps are taken, they can never be taken back. The only thing we can do is to hold each other's hands tightly from now on, so that no matter how deep and dark the night is, the dawn will finally usher in the dawn.

I have stood silently behind you and watched for so long, and now it is time for this banquet to end.

Behind the pillars of the platform, a figure has been staring at the disappearing direction of the train for a long time like a statue.The cigarette almost burned his fingers, but he curled up his lips and smiled quietly.

He also remembered that at the graduation ceremony in Haicheng, those three ignorant brats tried their best to put on a frivolous and frivolous look under the watchful eyes of the teachers and students of the school, while the most important thing he watched from beginning to end The audience did not even give him a look back, so even the most affectionate singing voice became the endorsement of heartbreak.

"If you fall in love with me, don't be afraid to regret it. One day I will go far away. I don't want to stay in one place, and I don't want anyone to follow me..." He held his head up and sang like a doomed fate .

How could I regret it.I have foreseen such a result from a long time ago, but I am not willing to let it go. I kept dreaming fragile dreams, until now I have to bow my head and admit my failure.

Time is a function, a Mobius ring that goes back and forth, a Klein bottle that connects the inside and the outside, time is a bottomless abyss, an endless ocean, the wrinkles of a young girl, the youth of an old woman , is the nightmare of history and the hope of the future.

You want to see love, it makes you see parting.You want to see life, it makes you see death.If you want to see warmth, it makes you see winter.You want to see joy, it makes you see struggle.If you want to see eternity, it makes you see the momentary decay.

But at least, it made me understand a truth that not everyone can understand.

If you like someone, you should have the consciousness of being let down from the very beginning, but you still have no hesitation.

On the train, the scenery outside the window flew by, and Bai Yuze had been silent for nearly four or ten minutes.

There was a pungent smell of instant noodles mixed with body odor in the carriage, Leng Shan ignored the strange gaze of the aunt opposite, pressed Bai Yuze's head on his shoulder and held it quietly.

"...You all think that I don't know. In fact, I do." After an unknown amount of time, Bai Yuze finally spoke in a low voice. He paused for a long time, as if it was a bit difficult to speak.

"Xie Zhe's dealing with me..."

Although Leng Shan didn't seem to change his expression, he was startled in his heart, and turned to look at him. "when will you……?"

"I'm a bit dull, but I'm not stupid." Bai Yuze slowly sat up straight, lowering his head to avoid his gaze. "Just... the time I ran away from home. He stayed at Xie Zhe's house at night, and he thought I fell asleep, and then..." The boy's ears turned red, and then he hesitated and reached out and nodded his side face. "He just... kissed him lightly."

"What?! That bastard!" Leng Shan couldn't help blurting out angrily, only feeling the veins on her forehead throbbing vigorously, but she didn't notice the terrified look on the face of the aunt opposite.When he finally realized that he was losing his composure, he coughed lightly and lowered his voice again. "Then you... didn't say anything?"

Bai Yuze felt speechless, so he gave him a helpless look. "What do you mean, how do you mean it? We've always been able to get along so naturally, and I don't have to rely on me to be stupid. If one day I suddenly say to him, 'Hey brother, are you secretly in love with me?' I will see you when I look up and look down. , most likely don’t even have to be friends.”

Leng Shan was silent for a long time after hearing the words, "He... is a good buddy."

"Of course. As long as he wants to, there are countless opportunities to break us up. He has helped us so much behind the scenes..." Bai Yuze closed his eyes, and the boy in his memory was grinning, as if he had never been unhappy, even if If you are not happy, you will never put sadness on your face.

——What are you saying thanks to your buddy, idiot.

yes.Even if I don't say it, I think you can understand it.

"Xie Zhe... is the person I am most grateful to and owes the most in my life."

Looking at the serious expressions of the people around her, Fir Shan remained silent.He remembered what Xie Zhe had said to him at the gate of the clinic that day.

—You remember, Fir.What you owe me, you have to pay.

Sighing lightly, he turned his head to look at the scenery instead of him.

It's raining.

The cigarette butt between his fingers was mercilessly extinguished, and the long hair of the figure passing by Fang was fluttering, and a note was stuffed into his hand so easily.

"Coward." Chen Ye scolded him softly before leaving the platform, but he was not really angry.

Not intending to refute, Xie Zhe unfolded the piece of paper with water-stained hands, and then stopped.With mixed feelings in his heart, he threw away the cigarette butt in agitation, but when he turned around, he ran straight into someone's arms.

"Yo, I'm finally willing to move. I've been showering with you for a long time." Yao Lu took advantage of the situation and stretched out her arms to hug him, her wet hair rubbing against Xie Zhe's neck.

"I thought you wouldn't come today..." Xie Zhe looked confused.

"I thought so too." The other party smiled heartily, then hooked his shoulder and walked out.

"Let's go, I'll treat you to dinner..."

They stayed in the hotel from noon to night that day.Later, Xie Zhe got drunk and couldn't stop a car on the road, so Yao Lu carried him back in the heavy rain.

On the way, Xie Zhe kept talking in a low voice, crying for a while, laughing for a while, and then suddenly broke away from the support, and threw a small ball of paper from the viaduct with all his strength.

Not even a single ripple was stirred up in the center of the lake, Xie Zhe was lying on the edge of the bridge in a daze, seeing that little bit of whiteness was soon submerged by the turbulence. ...

On the way, I passed a dilapidated audio-visual store, and the sad and vicissitudes of old songs kept wafting from the speakers with rough sound quality.The two walked in silence, sometimes raising their faces to see the black clouds slowly covering the city's silent rainy night.

Forget it, it's a kind of luck if you can

If a person's heart can only burn out one name

Where are two people going, holding hands is a world

一生 啊 有 可 珍惜

流浪人 没 奢侈 的 爱情

Have this life and be brothers in this life

I will miss you again in the next life

The drifting river rains every night and every night

想起 你

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

It was pouring rain in the early hours of the morning.After stepping into the store, Ning Ziyue put the black umbrella by the door, and walked silently through the carnival crowd like a ghost, until he saw the familiar figure beside the bar.

Sitting down a seat away from him, before the bartender asked, Quan Yue had already pushed over a glass of light blue Margarita in his hand.Ning Ziyue didn't move.

Quan Yue turned his face to look at the slightly wet hair tip on his forehead, and hooked his lips. "It's really raining outside. Isn't it?"

"...Tonight is your last chance." Ning Ziyue stared calmly ahead as if he didn't hear it. "If you don't kill me tonight, I will send you to prison with my own hands."

"Oh. That's interesting." Quan Yue raised his eyebrows with interest, shaking the wine glass in his hand unhurriedly. "Then you came to the appointment today because you asked me to kill you?"

"As long as you are willing to tell me the truth," Ning Ziyue finally shifted his eyes to his face, the eyes were so deep that people would have the illusion that they would be inhaled in the next second. "—The truth about my father's fall from the cliff."

Quan Yue smiled.

Then he just stretched out his hands and patted it twice, and the hustle and bustle in the whole bar suddenly disappeared. No matter whether they were singing, dancing or other things in the last second, people spoke as if they had rehearsed in advance. Bufa lined up to leave the field, and in a blink of an eye there were only the two of them left in the huge space, and even the waiters retreated knowingly.

The young man was not surprised when he saw this, Quan Yue silently lit the cigarette on his lips under his gaze, and the smile on his face never disappeared from the beginning to the end.

"Have you finally asked? I guess, no matter how slow you are, you should have discovered the secret of our two names."

When Ning Ling and I met for the first time.

At that time, I was just a street gangster with a few minions. Your father was a year older than me.

As you know, there are a lot of gangsters in the city and on the street, and they are all at a young age, so fierce friction is often inevitable.My brothers and I were already at a disadvantage in terms of numbers that night, and we were plotted against. The law and order was very bad that year. If Ning Ling hadn't happened to pass by to fight against injustices, we might have lost our lives.

You should have seen pictures of your father when he was young.Very similar to what you look like now, but a little different.He is the kind of person who makes people never look away when they see him at the first sight. He has a very attractive quality all over his body, which makes people want to get close involuntarily without feeling the slightest sense of distance.

Maybe it's a bit strange to say that, but after getting to know him, it seems that I can't tolerate others anymore, and the brothers who were very strong in the past have also become alienated.When I was free, I would squat outside the factory gate and wait for him to get off work. If the work was free, he would go out with me for a few drinks after dark.In short, we gradually became close, although I was still an ignorant gangster, but he was still a good-natured young man in the eyes of others.

Over the past few years, my subordinates have become stronger and stronger, and your father's career has also been on the right track.Occasionally when I ran into trouble in the gang, he would go to the emergency without saying a word and put down the work at hand.I don't know what your father thinks, anyway, he has long been beyond friends and brothers in my heart.Of course, I always avoided talking about this until that day.

It may be because of resistance at work. That night Ning Ling drank a few more glasses than usual. I saw that he was a little delirious, so I sent him all the way to the door. Who knew that he got drunk later and blocked the door in a daze. Did not let me go.Thinking that it would be okay to take care of him overnight as a friend, I didn't insist anymore.

But things are far from as simple as I thought.

"Do you know what happened after that?" Quan Yue exhaled smoke, his black eyes were darker and colder than the night.

Ning Ziyue seemed to have vaguely guessed something, and unconsciously clenched his fists.

“你从小一直尊敬、挚爱的父亲在那一晚强上了我。我本来是可以狠狠揍他一顿然后推开他头也不回地离开的，但是我没有——”已不再年轻The man with a cigarette in his mouth smiled lowly, with a self-deprecating and cruel expression on his face. "...Why did you push it away?"

Knowing that there would be no result, we still fell in love.Even if they are lying on the same bed, they must hide their most secret desires and swear that they will not hinder each other's future.

"Even if it's only once... Ning Zi said he loved me." Quan Yue's eyes wandered, he raised his hand and slowly caressed Ning Ziyue's solemn side face, as if he was trying to see the other side of the stubborn boy in his eyes. shadow of man.

"...then why do you want to get married? Why do you decide to give up just because you can't see the result... The most ironic thing is that I can't do anything but smile when I see him happy as a newlywed. You tell me, this is called 'Love'?"

Ning Ziyue didn't know how to answer, he was still immersed in the shock of knowing the truth and couldn't react.

"Especially after you were born, Ning Ling put more and more emphasis on family, and seldom took care of the affairs of the gang. I can clearly feel that he is avoiding my feelings frequently, so I never forced him, and I was afraid of him. It disappeared from there. But even so, he was tired and wanted to get out. So he went directly to the police station to report me without any hesitation, and revealed all the secrets of the drug trade in the gang to the note. Ning him, They want me to die."

Quan Yue's lips curved into a mocking arc again, and pointed to the faint scar on his eyebrow with his finger. "Thanks to him, although I managed to escape later, I left a bloody lesson forever. After I found him, I gave him two ways, stay with me, or die. Guess what he would choose?..."

Ning Ziyue just shook his head.

"He wouldn't betray a friend just because he wanted to leave you. At the end of the day, you shouldn't be involved in such a dangerous circle as drug trafficking."

I always thought that the other party must be responsible for the wounds all over my body, but I forgot who handed the knife to the other party in person in the first place.The dusty past, what is right and what is wrong, seems to have become less important after years of dilution.

"So, I have to thank him for giving me a chance to go to the underworld for labor reform?" The cigarette has been burned out, and Quan Yue is obviously not as easy to let go as he is. Pop into a wine glass.

"Having reached this point, I simply won't hide it from you anymore. The reason why I let you live until now is because you are the most like him in this world. But it is also because of this that I will never let you have a good time——I want You watched your most important people die in pain one by one, but you couldn't do anything.

"I heard about Lin Ran, but it was purely an accident. I didn't think it would be so easy to let him die. Su Yang, I just sent people two days ago, and he is probably trying his best to escape now. As for that beautiful friend of yours—" Seeing Ning Ziyue's pupils shrink suddenly, the man lowered his voice viciously.

"...I heard that he has important evidence that will threaten me. It's a pity, I still liked him so much at first—just like I liked Ah Yin back then. But since it's something you like, I also like him. Only slowly -- destroying him bit by bit."

"How dare you!" Ning Ziyue burst into anger, but before he could make another move, he was stopped by a probing voice behind him.

"Ning Ziyue?"

When he turned his head, he even forgot to hide the undefended panic in his eyes, so the other party walked down the steps of the door inexplicably, "What kind of expression do you have? Didn't you ask me to come here in the middle of the night? Why don't you change to an unfamiliar number—"

The ending ended abruptly the moment he saw Quan Yue's sly smiling face, and Yao Lu cursed "shit" in displeasure.

"It turned out to be your fault. Why, miss the smell of pepper spray?"

"No, I just want to see you." Quan Yue's almost explicit love words made Yao Lu tremble all over, but the man seemed to be more happy when he saw this. "There seemed to be some misunderstandings between Ziyue and I before, but after a long conversation just now we have shaken hands and made peace. So I thought, such an important moment must be witnessed by a person—"

Ning Ziyue stared at Quan Yue's amiable face, and Yao Lu didn't believe a single word of his nonsense, so he interrupted his long speech impatiently: "So? Please get to the point quickly. , I have to go back to sleep."

"So, for Ziyue's sake, let's drink the wine." Quan Yue gestured for him to take the glass of light blue liquid that Ning Ziyue had neglected with his eyes, smiling gently. "It's rare for me to appreciate someone so much. It's not too much to just invite someone I like to have a glass of wine, right?"

Seeing that his goosebumps were about to roll off the ground if he continued, Yao Lu let out a "hum" and raised her hand to grab the wine glass.It's just that Ning Ziyue was one step ahead of him, and when his hand was about to touch the wine glass, he picked it up with a livid face, and drank it clean in two gulps.

Throwing the cup back on the table heavily, Ning Ziyue ignored Quan Yue's meaningful gaze, and pulled Yao Lu who was confused by the side and walked out.

"Wait—what's the matter with you?..."

Ning Ziyue didn't respond to him at all, and pulled him out of the bar all the way. The rain outside didn't stop.Not even caring about the umbrella, he led him angrily through the rain for a few streets, then suddenly stopped in his tracks, let go of his hands and turned around with a very bad expression on his face.

"Do you not understand the situation at all? You come out when someone you don't know asks you to come out. Have you considered the possibility of being a trap? I have told you over and over again, don't get involved with my affairs, why don't you listen? "

Yao Lu got angry when she heard the words, and couldn't help but raise the volume amidst the sound of the rain: "You think I'm willing to mix in? The text message was sent in your name, but I couldn't get through when I called, and your own number is still turned off, what can I do?" ? Leave it alone? I'm just wondering, are you so disgusted with other people's concern? Are you arrogant?"

"Thank you, I don't need that kind of thing." The scene where he crashed and crashed on the roof last night was in his head, and his mood became more anxious, and he couldn't choose what to say. "If you have time, it's better to think about how to keep the people you really care about. People like me are not worth your trouble."

Yao Lu was taken aback, partly because he didn't understand what he was talking about, partly because of the unprecedented indifference in his tone.

In fact, as soon as he turned around and took a step, Ning Ziyue regretted it, but he thought it was the best.After all, if he gets involved with him again in the future, according to Quan Yue's words, it will definitely end badly.

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