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The breeze is blowing by my ear, this should be the most gentle early spring season, I opened my eyes, only a emptiness, here... nothing...

"Do you want to continue? Huh?"

"No! No! I beg you! I beg you..."

"You beg me?"

"Yes! I beg you! I can do whatever you want me to do! Anything! I beg you! Stop...don't..."

"Okay, come here..."

"come over!"

"..."

"Look at her!"

"Look at her! You bloody beast!"

"Come... look at her..."

"..."

"Hahaha! How interesting! It's so easy to be fooled!"

"……why?"

"I feel happy, there is no reason!"

"I'm already like this...what else do you want?"

"Just now you said that you can do anything, now..."

"You're going to hell."

"Really? I don't know if I will go to hell, but... you are already in it!"

"just kill me……"

"No!"

"Why? Is this interesting?! What kind of hatred do I have with you!"

"Think about it... What's there?... Don't you remember?"

"I beg you...kill me..."

"No!"

"What do you want?!"

"I want you to enjoy it slowly... Isn't this what you like? Huh?"

"You pervert!"

"Yeah, I'm a pervert, what can you do with me?"

"You let her go! I don't want to see her!"

"I just want her to watch... not only her, but also that cute little girl..."

"...you don't want me to die?"

"Yeah! How boring I am when you die!"

"Hehe... then... never, goodbye..."

Somewhere, there are those voices echoing, who are they?Who is talking?so familiar... these conversations...

But still can't see any picture, only dialogue, I can only hear those...

"Om--------!"

Conversation turns into cacophony...

"Om--------!"

The tinnitus is getting worse...

"Yin Yu!"

someone is calling me...

"Yin Yu!"

who is it?so noisy...

"Damn it! Wake me up!"

Why... I don't want to 'wake up'... I'm always awake...

"Yin Yu!"

With a sound of "Bang!", the glass door of the bathroom was smashed, and Zhao Boyang and some people whose faces I couldn't see rushed in.They're still here...

"We all know..."

Someone seems to be saying this in my ear...

Know?what do you know?You don't know anything fucking!I lifted my heavy eyelids with great effort, and sat up from the bathtub, the bloody water pulled me down like a suction vortex, it hurt so much!But not enough to kill a person.

After a long pause, but only a few seconds seemed to pass, I raised my twisted hand... so ugly... the nails are crooked...

bleeding...

why?

There was a constant buzzing in my ears.

"Yin Yu!"

It was Zhao Boyang's voice again...

"I'm going to hell..." I murmured, and fell into a void again...

……

It's not winter, it's not summer, it's autumn.I don’t know who woven that scarf for me, but it is indeed a good choice to keep warm and keep out the wind in late autumn in the north. The style and color of the scarf are also my preference.I rode my bike back to school, and there were still those letters stuffed in my desk, those letters that conveyed my feelings...

However, what is emotion?What is admiration?Do I count as admiration for her?Do I also understand human feelings?

Do I adore her?

I opened those letters to find out.

First letter:

Hello, maybe you don't remember me, but that's okay...

……

I like you, would you like to be my boyfriend?

Second letter:

Since bumping into you in the hallway last time...

……

Let's celebrate Valentine's Day together!

Third letter:

If you dare to accept love letters from other girls, I will kill you!

……

I'll go to your place tonight, wait for me.

Fourth letter:

I love you.

……

No.30 three letters:

I'm leaving, you come find me after class.

I put those envelopes and letter papers together and stuffed them back into the table. It was so strange... This kind of prank-like thing has happened for a whole month. There were not so many inexplicable letters in the beginning. People are really strange , especially among a group of children whose bodies are obviously immature, those boys and girls who are overflowing with emotions are so unpredictable.I suddenly thought of the content of the last letter and the handwriting on it, so familiar...it was written by her...

why?

strange premonition...

I almost saw my future. If I go to see her again, it may lead to more tragic consequences than death, but why?Those "scenes" that I can see, are they premonitions?

I gave up thinking about these questions and rode across the street that separated us.

"You're here." She turned her back to me.

"Where are you going?" I asked.

"I'm not going anywhere, I just want to see if you will come, but, you are here..."

Yes, from that moment on, I have been under her control, and I am willing to be controlled by her.But I was wrong.

I left her, didn't want to see her face that fascinated me anymore, and rode my car back home, only to see the guy who threatened to castrate me in the letter...

People are born with a cheap bone!

Pain, endless, pain, is the best catharsis, what am I?What counts here?I miss something that I can't even remember...

He is a young boy hundreds of years younger than me, and he is in the process of inflicting pain on me. It is I, a devil, who dragged him into hell...

But he was grateful to me and smiled very contentedly...

She is a young girl who is also hundreds of years younger than me, but she sent me back to hell, she is a child with infinite charm, I am obsessed with her...

However, the first person who discovered that I was enjoying the depravity in hell was not any of them, nor was it the person who I have always regarded as the most important friend in the world, but an insignificant guy...

"Don't spoil Boyang! This is my last warning to you!"

That person, in front of the arrogant me, I thought he was ignorant, but not long after, I let the purest soul see the filth in hell, he looked at my actions in disbelief, and was shocked I had to freeze in place. Of course, if I didn’t abandon me in the end, that’s another story...

The meaning of life is redemption.

Anyone who does not sincerely repent should go to hell!So, hell is still everywhere...

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