lonely patient

The drug caused me to quickly fall into sleepiness. Before falling asleep, I still held Wen Luming's hand and murmured that I didn't want him to go.

Sometimes I wonder if he is doing this to me on purpose, to drive me into despair and give me a glimmer of hope, so that my willpower will be crushed day by day, and I will never be able to leave him again.

Even so, I admit it... I haven't had a peaceful night's sleep for a long time, and now I just want to be by his side.

But when I woke up he was still gone.

I stared at the blank ceiling in a daze for a few seconds, wondering what happened yesterday was just a dream of mine.

Is it a dream?How could Wen Luming hug me, how could he be so gentle to me.

I sat up slowly, got out of bed carefully and found the wheelchair, trying to see if he had been discharged from the hospital.

As soon as he arrived at the door of the ward, there were faint voices coming from the corridor outside.

……

"Are you going to look for him again?" It seemed to be Xia Yi's voice.

No need to think about it, the person opposite is Wen Luming.

"You have promised to marry me, why are you still refusing to let him go?" Xia Yi asked.

After a moment of silence, I heard Wen Luming say so calmly that he was almost cold: "You should know why I married you, and you should also know that this marriage has no substance. I have already called the registration office and asked them to suspend the material review. Don't worry, I will help if I promised to help you, but it is impossible to marry you again, sorry."

"You know I don't want you to help me!" Xia Yi's voice suddenly increased, "It's been so long, can't you really see it?"

"Xia Yi." Wen Luming interrupted him lightly, "You are my student, and I will help you just because I cherish my talents. I hope you understand that some words that are too much will only hurt the relationship between teachers and students .”

"But I..." Xia Yi still wanted to say something.

"On the day Yan Qiao returned to China, you hinted that he came to embarrass you and embarrass you. At that time, I had some doubts. With his character, how could he be angry with the third person in the matter between the two of us?"

Wen Luming seldom gets angry with others, but now there is a hidden anger in his voice that makes me feel nervous.

"It's just my fault that I wasn't sober enough to believe him right away. Now that I think about it, I only feel regret... What about you, what did you say to him that day?"

Xia Yi didn't speak.

I quietly opened the door a crack, and saw Wen Luming's back not far away, and Xia Yi who bit his lip and bowed his head in silence opposite him.

Wen Luming shook his head and said: "In the final analysis, it's my fault. I almost killed him with a wrong choice. I don't want to argue with you anymore. I just want to tell you that no matter before or in the future, I will always, It can only be your teacher."

……

I was inexplicably relieved when I heard this, and was about to close the door quietly, when Xia Yi suddenly smiled coldly, looked up at Wen Luming, and asked, "Really?"

With tears in his eyes, his eyes were full of deep hatred born of love, "Have you forgotten what happened the day I saw Yan Qiao's wedding news for the first time?"

My movements stopped, and suddenly I felt a bad feeling.

"I'll tell you if I forgot." Xia Yi took a step closer, with a vindictive smile on his face, and said word by word: "You were drunk, and I kissed you, but you didn't refuse."

"I don't mind you calling Yan Qiao's name when you kiss, but guess what, would Yan Qiao mind?"

Kiss, what do you mean... My arms go limp, and I instinctively want to grab something.The door next to me made a loud bang, and I accidentally slammed it shut.

Wen Luming kissed Xia Yi...is this my punishment?

Punish my past indulgence and game world, punish every soft lips I linger on.

The outside sound disappeared, and I slowly let go of the doorknob, retracted my palm into the sleeve of the large hospital gown, and squeezed my palm hard.

I wanted to hide and pretend I didn't hear, but before I could get back to bed, the door of the ward was pushed open by Wen Luming.

I met his gaze, dodged unconsciously, smiled as if nothing happened, and said, "Teacher Wen, you are here."

"Did you hear that?" There was a hint of panic in his voice, but also regret and self-blame that couldn't be concealed.

I tried my best to maintain my expression and asked, "What did you hear?"

Wen Luming walked up to me, squatted down and looked into my eyes, and said in a low voice, "Don't lie to me."

So the words of lying stuck in my throat, I lowered my eyes and said, "It's just a kiss, it's okay..."

I told Wen Luming and said to myself, it's just a kiss, it's okay.

Who can kiss only one person for a lifetime, I can't, and Wen Luming naturally can't either.What's more, the two of us have already broken up, whoever we kiss is his freedom, and he didn't do it on purpose, I have no position to blame him...

I found a hundred reasons to convince myself that I don't mind, I shouldn't mind.

I really don't mind.

"Yan Qiao." Wen Luming put his hands on my shoulders, forcing me to look up at him, but he seemed unable to explain it, and after saying my name, he said nothing.

This is probably a kind of acknowledgment that what Xia Yi said is true.

I raised my hand to smooth his frowning brows, tried to smile, and said, "Don't listen to him, I don't mind."

I even took the initiative to hug him, put my chin on his shoulder very lightly, and said: "The doctor said that I will be discharged from the hospital next week, and I want to go home."

After a long time, Wen Luming put his hand on my back slowly, hugged me back, and said softly: "The cat misses you very much."

The cat misses me very much, what about the person?

I dare not ask.

Summer comes vigorously and leaves quietly. After a heavy rain, the leaves of the sycamore trees outside the window have begun to turn yellow.

The original wedding date was approaching, and Wen Luming and I tacitly did not mention this matter to each other, nor did I ask him what Xia Yi should do.

If I intervene, this is probably not a problem at all. Apart from life and death, there is nothing in the world that cannot be solved with money.But I don't want to bother or ask, as if as long as I don't face it, I can fool myself that this marriage never existed.

I didn't see Xia Yi again after that day, and it wasn't until before I was discharged from the hospital that I mustered up the courage to grab Wen Luming and ask, "Xia Yi...is he still living at your house?"

"He found a house a few days ago and moved out." Wen Luming said.

"Oh……"

Perhaps seeing that I was depressed, Wen Luming stroked my hair and asked: "You haven't eaten during this period of hospitalization, can you cook pork rib porridge for you when you go back?"

I didn't have any appetite, but I obediently agreed: "Yes."

Wen Luming's car was scrapped in that heavy rain, and he got a new one, and there was still the same small pillow on the passenger side.

It was because I did too much one night, and the next day my waist was sore and my legs were weak but I had to go to work in the company. Wen Luming had to use this to support my waist.Later, the pillow was left in the car and became my exclusive.

I picked up the new throw pillow and realized it was just the same style, not the original one.Still, it brought back some fond memories for me.

"You still remember this." I hugged the pillow and said with a slight smile.

Wen Luming glanced at me indifferently, "I remember all your things." He drove the car, his eyes looked lonely, "At that time you said no more, I put them away for you, and nothing was lost."

"It was you who said you didn't want me first, put away all my things, and prepared to drive me away..." I defended in a low voice, and my nails subconsciously picked the print on the pillow.

"I don't know how I can be so cruel." Wen Luming sighed softly, "Can you understand? Yan Qiao, there is something you have been chasing for too long, and you have already looked down upon it, but when you are about to touch it Sometimes, you start to become irritable, even paranoid. When I see you sad, I also think, should I keep watching you from a distance, so that you can always be happy. "

"No!" I turned my head to look over and interrupted Wen Luming anxiously, "Don't think so."

He was driving, and I didn't dare to make any big movements to distract him, so I had to explain clumsily: "I'm not sad, and I never regret being with you, don't think so..."

I was afraid that Wen Luming would feel remorse again and say something appropriate or inappropriate to me.

There are no gears that fit perfectly together in this world. It's not just that two jagged fragments chisel and polish themselves until they are bloody and bloody, and then they become a good fit for each other.

Although I haven't completely become the most suitable person for him, I am working hard.

Wen Luming stopped at the intersection of red lights, turned his head to look at me, there was unspeakable complexity in his eyes.

"Don't do this." He raised his hand and touched my face, as if to comfort a small animal, "I have no regrets. Even if I do it a hundred times, I will still walk towards you that summer evening."

On that summer evening, under the luxuriant shadow of the sycamore tree, I thought it was just an ordinary encounter in my life, but for Wen Luming, it might be a lonely and adventurous journey.

From the moment he walked towards me, our two lives were derailed and entangled with each other to this day, becoming a mess of threads that are constantly being cut and untangled.

Can you tell who is right and who is wrong?It seems impossible.

"I forgot to ask you," Wen Luming changed the subject, "I donated so much before, do you still have money now?"

I knew he was teasing me about the lab building, trying to make it easy for me.So I seriously shook my head cooperatively and said, "No more."

To some extent, there is indeed no more donations that should be given away.

"Professor Wen raised me." I said.

When the green light came on, a faint smile appeared on the corner of Wen Luming's lips, "Yeah."