[Comprehensive] Teacher Songyang is always committing suicide

Dazai's mobility is very high.

I told Songyang to burn charcoal the first day, and prepared all the charcoal the next day.The two of them sat in the narrow bathroom and ordered a pot of charcoal blocks. Dazai also grilled two pairs of chicken wings and sausages on the charcoal blocks, saying that he was going to die of carbon monoxide poisoning in the delicious smell of food.

"Actually, I don't really admire this method of suicide." Dazai said, holding his "Complete Suicide Manual", "Although carbon monoxide poisoning is called 'the most beautiful corpse', considering the condition of incontinence, ah really It's so embarrassing to think about it! When the body was carried out, the crotch was still—"

Song Yang frowned and shook his hands at him, because he was eating the baked chicken wings.

"However, I don't know if the constitution of pine nuts can be poisoned~ Yesterday's cough medicine is completely ineffective."

This person also changed his name without authorization, probably because he thought that if he committed suicide together, he would become an adult, and he didn't even call her Miss.

"This time must be the last train. It's really nice to meet you, Matsuko."

We both took the last train together again.Nice to meet you Mr. Dazai.

——Why is Dazai-san so obsessed with suicide?

But just like Dazai said, the reason for a person's suicide is the same as a woman's age, and it is a question that would be impolite to ask rashly.When Songyang was still baking a pair of chicken wings, Dazai coughed and yawned, saying that he was sleepy and wanted to sleep for a while.

Then he climbed into the bathtub and fell asleep with his hands clasped as if in a coffin.

Because of the insanity caused by carbon monoxide poisoning, he still can't understand how his body works this time.I just felt that the poisonous gas I inhaled reached a critical point. After losing consciousness for a short time, I suddenly woke up on the bathroom floor, feeling refreshed.

...Is this considered to have died once?

When this body was revived, it brought with it muscle memory from long ago.In his vague memory, he accidentally touched something cold.

Songyang, who had to re-accept his immortality setting, sat on the bathroom floor and struggled for a while.Dazai was quietly lying in the bathtub next to him, his beautiful face was light red, and he seemed to be in good spirits.Songyang carefully stretched out his hand to check the other party's breath, and there was still a faint breath.

He is facing an extremely difficult philosophical problem: a person who was planning to commit suicide lies dying in front of him, should he be saved or not?

In the end, Songyang quietly extinguished the charcoal in the basin and turned on the ventilation fan in the bathroom.Worried that Dazai would blame him when he woke up, he simply lay down on the floor and pretended to be unconscious.

"Pine nuts?"

He didn't know how long he had been lying on the wet and cold floor, when he heard the young man's soft cry.

Dazai woke up in the bathtub.Glancing at the extinguished charcoal brazier, the young man sighed regretfully, stretched out his hand and patted Songyang's face.

"Pine nuts? Wake up."

Songyang continued to pretend to be unconscious.It wasn't until the young man climbed out of the bathtub in a daze, putting his elbows under his legs, as if he was about to be hugged by a princess, that Songyang quickly opened his eyes.

"It's a failure." The young man looked down at him, his black hair was a little damp, curled and stuck to his cheek.He showed a sad smile, "Our last train overturned again."

Dazai recuperated in the middle of the Japanese-style room lavishly, with a pillow covering his face.Songyang quietly cleaned up the charcoal basin and grilled sausages in the bathroom, then went to the bedroom to dig out Dazai's newly bought shirt and trousers, and took off his kimono.

"Song—Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!" Dazai covered his face with his hands, his eyes poking out between his fingers, "Such a scene is too sweet for someone who is still recovering!"

Song Yang has almost gotten used to his exaggeration. After changing his clothes calmly, he took the mobile phone on the table and typed for him: [I really wasn't a womanizer before. ]

"What are you talking about, women's fetishism-Songzi is a girl in the first place!"

[no.I am male. ]

Dazai stared at the words on the screen for 3 minutes, his pupils trembled violently for a while, and then he laughed again: "Forget it, forget it! If Songzi likes to wear men's clothes, just wear them! Even men's clothes can't do it." To cover up Ms. Songzi's beauty, my desire to die in love with Ms. is not less than one iota!"

Songyang tilted his head helplessly.He thought about opening the collar for a while, but just after he unbuttoned two buttons, the black-haired youth shot out of the window like a cannonball: "yiya~~~~~~~~~~~"

...forget it.

After burning charcoal with Dazai, the body brought back some memories.It feels like a very long time ago, but the pain is unforgettable——

Someone is gouging his eyes.

There is no purpose, just repeatedly gouging out his eyes full of malice and playfulness.

The flashbacks to the memory were horrific.But the memory retained in his body clearly told him that this was not some b-grade movie, but something that actually happened to him.

Why did the world treat him like this?

Did he do something bad?

He sat in the Japanese room and racked his brains to recall, but he was still puzzled.

Two sticky notes that Dazai had stuck to the bookshelf fell down, and they were scribbled like in a dream [The so-called world, isn't it you? ], he slowly reached out to pick it up, hesitated, and stuck it on the bookshelf.

On Tuesday, it rained in their city.The road was gray, and Songyang came out of the convenience store by the river, carrying two big bags of this week's ingredients and daily necessities.

The Armed Detective Agency where Dazai works is a combat organization that only those with supernatural powers can enter.As an ordinary person (who can punch people into the center of the earth with one punch), Songyang certainly has no way to get a glimpse of Dazai's daily work.I feel very sorry for staying at Dazai's house all the time, although Dazai has been joking that "my salary can fully support Miss", but Songyang still plans to find a part-time job nearby.

With shopping bags in both hands, it was difficult for him to get the umbrella out of the bag.Songyang was about to hang one of the bags on the other arm when he saw a black-haired young man hopping over from the river bank with a small red umbrella in his hand.

Are you going to hold an umbrella for me?That was a big thank you.

Shoyang raised his head and smiled at him, and Dazai responded with a soft smile.Then in the next second, he threw the little red umbrella upside down, knocking something in the air off course.

"Songzi can stay in the convenience store obediently and don't move around?"

Dazai's tone was slightly frivolous as usual, but the look in his eyes was a bit cold.He also enthusiastically helped Songyang carry a heavy shopping bag and put it into the automatic door of the convenience store.

"Ah, curry is the staple food this week?"

Before Songyang could answer, the automatic glass door of the convenience store was completely shattered.

In the gray rain, there are countless black ribbon-like things hunting and dancing in the air.That kind of thing looks very soft, but once it hits the road, trees, or utility poles, it will cut off instantly like a sharp knife. It is obviously some kind of extremely sharp weapon.

With his back to the automatic door, Dazai helped Matsuyo block most of the flying glass shards. "Although pine nuts can heal super quickly, I don't even want the young lady to feel any pain." After saying sweet words with a smile like this, he lazily shook the glass shards on his body, and looked back at the dark and dark water in the rain. The figure said:

"It's you who is on this mission, Akutagawa."

Manipulating these black streamers is a short and thin young man.The other party was completely black from head to toe, and his complexion was as pale as paper. He couldn't help coughing for a while after walking two steps.Different from his frail appearance, those jet-black ribbons attacked extremely ferociously, they penetrated deep into the ground, and exploded sharp black thorns at the place where Dazai was standing.

...An eye-opener, is this what the Armed Detective Agency often says about [a person with different abilities]?

"Please trouble Kunikida-kun. It's useless for you to come to me."

Dazai easily dodged the blow, supported himself on the wet ground with one hand, and jumped over a streamer that wanted to break his legs like a skipping rope.He walked around in the rain, no matter how he looked at it, he seemed to be able to do a job with ease.

Song Yang squatted obediently behind the shelf at the door, seeing that the two were concentrating on fighting, he lowered his head to pick up the radishes and oranges that fell out of the shopping bag.The black streamers flying all over the sky outside the convenience store turned into thousand-headed snake-shaped monsters, with their mouths opening and closing to reveal sharp teeth. Most of them went towards Dazai. One of them seemed to be in an indiscriminate attack mode. When he found Songyang who was silently picking up oranges, Zhang The big black mouth shot towards Songyang.

What is the level of your own fighting power?Memories about the battle were naturally erased as well.

Songyang raised his hand tentatively to take an orange, and was about to stuff it into the snake-headed monster's mouth, when Dazai said unhappily, "I'm angry."

He loosened the bandages on his hands and grabbed the head of one of the snakes that was attacking his face.Like a mimosa that has been touched to the body, the heads of snakes turned into supernatural powers shrank back one after another, and then disappeared abruptly in the air.

"It's not the first time you've seen my superpowers, why do you still have such a surprised expression?" Dazai laughed, "No way, if you hurt our lady. That's the one I finally found who was willing to die with me Miss."

The pitch-black young man named Akutagawa showed a strange look on his face, similar to sarcasm, but also somewhat distorted anger.He glanced at Songyang, and didn't complain about the "lady" in men's clothes, coughing lowly while talking: "Since you want to commit suicide so much, isn't it just right to let 'Rashomon' penetrate your body obediently?" ?”

"Let me refuse, that is not my ideal way to commit suicide. Since the world allowed me to be born without asking me, then the way I seek death must fully implement my will, so that I can also feel the happiness of deciding my own destiny Just feel it."

Dazai was drenched all over, and walked lightly past Akutagawa's side.Akutagawa who had been deprived of supernatural powers seemed to be more vulnerable than ordinary people. He took a step back, as if he was worried that Dazai would punch him.

In the end, Dazai just hopped to the riverside.Immediately, Songyang reacted, stepped through the shattered glass door, stepped onto the river bank in the rain, and tried to hold Dazai who jumped into the river after "hey".

In the end, Dazai took off too quickly, and he couldn't stop him.Dazai, who was about to fall into the turbulent river in a second, saw him, but smiled happily at him, "You're here!" He grabbed Song Yang's waist with both hands, and rolled him into the river together.

Song Yang choked up several times, wanted to grab the other person's shoulder and shout, but found that he couldn't make a sound at all, so he choked a few times in vain.

——Mr. Dazai, I just bought curry for [-] people for half the price!Eat at least half of it for me before committing suicide!