[Projectile] You smile at the hope called despair

I know.

In this world—

There are many sad things.

I'm so, so powerless—

All I could do was watch as this happened.

(Can't forgive...)

There is nothing I can do to help.

A destiny that cannot be changed.

People who cannot be saved.

A feeling that cannot be conveyed.

Feelings that cannot understand each other.

unfulfilled agreement.

Looking forward to a happy world full of smiles cannot come.

In the past, I always excused myself - saying that the rules of the world are like this, and only the strong are qualified to have laughter.

Only the strong are qualified to decide their own destiny.

Only by following in their footsteps will you be qualified to hold your head high.

Only by being affirmed can this sad world be changed.

...I am not the chosen one.

My efforts have not been affirmed and have no results.

I have been busy in such a desperate world, and I have long forgotten the carefree days that brought everyone a smile.

However, even if I am like this, I was redeemed by her smile.

She affirmed this kind of me, accepted this kind of me——

I feel so happy to be with me like this.

I'm also really proud of being able to do things that make her smile.

She is an incredible person. Through her narration, I vaguely saw the past——

Little happy world.

I want to protect, she wants to understand and believe in this kind of mood.

I want to guard that vague, "another possibility".

Everyone has their own strength, everyone has their own value——

A future where we can laugh at each other regardless of identity.

However, I am still too weak.

The nine-headed dragon cannot be saved.

Can't save Sato.

Can't change this hopeless and dark world——

They remind me everywhere and let me know where I am.

They told me this is my destiny...

If it must be such a world...

If it must be such a fate...

... just destroy everything.

If I have power, even if I become a demon king and be hated forever, I will change everything.

For as long as I can remember all this hopelessness.

Even if the experiment fails and dies, it is more meaningful than doing nothing and living in vain.

To do nothing but to watch this happen—

I will never forgive myself for being like this.

……

As time went by, the figure of 'him' gradually became clear in his consciousness.

Now, I can fully see 'him' and hear 'him' voice.

……

"This is the original thought of 'I'... But after that, the will of 'I' was gradually destroyed. Because I knew everything that was concealed before, the ever-increasing denial, and the feeling of being betrayed by everything, this thought gradually distorted."

"I have completely become a tool-like existence, a betrayed desire, which made 'I' completely give up all struggles——At that time, I kept repeating these words in my heart—"

I can't forgive myself like this.

Desperate for myself who always can't do anything.

Anyway...it's already like this, it's fine anyway...

It's okay to die...

It doesn't matter how you are manipulated...

Sacrifice all of me...

At least, I, who has nothing, still has this use.

...Let me be everyone's hope.

"However, there is one more thing that 'I' can't let go of no matter how much I want to protect her. This kind of mood makes 'I' unwilling to die no matter what, and I am unwilling to disappear completely Lost—so they forcibly used all kinds of hints to temporarily cover this yearning."

"Afterwards, all sorts of accidents happened, and 'I' woke up again—perceived that people's hearts were so unbearable, they planned to completely block the thinking of 'I', and used various methods to guide 'I' to the place they wanted. "

"In this way, 'I' becomes 'you'."

That person—is this the 'Hyuga-kun' in Nanami's memory?

Didn't it disappear...why did it reappear here?

"...This kind of question can't be clearer... because, this is what you want..."

I hope, like this, to see you?

"You care about Qianqiu Qihai, and you are also curious about the person who can change her and give her such an impression. Although that person is so incompetent, and his status in the'jurisprudence' is so irrelevant...but, in your heart Deep down, I envy him—because no matter what you do, you can't compare to his position in Qihai Qianqiu's heart."

"So you have always wanted to understand what is so special about that person, and you want to understand his thoughts... In this way, the memory fragments that were sealed deep in your consciousness have been pieced together by your ability-this is 'me' Woolen cloth."

you?Why, since you are Hinata Chuang, why do you talk about your own affairs with such an attitude as if you are talking about other people's affairs?

"Because 'I' doesn't exist at all."

does not exist?

"Now you can't carry too many 'feelings', and you can't have too many 'thinking' beyond the distance...Because you are 'outflow from the throne of God'...Since you are 'outflow from the throne of God', you must follow the The destiny you have been given to bring hope to this world, there is no doubt about it. But... because you met her, you gradually lost your "godhead"... and because of all kinds of memory fragments, you want to shift your own Location - simply put, you've 'fallen'."

"Originally, you hated this kind of world, this kind of fate so much... You are destined not to be forgiven... You are afraid of this, and if the emotions involved in this fear break out, they will pull the 'wedge' The brain destruction that you bring—you're bound to break down. So, you created me like this. After all, it's irrelevant to talk about other people's affairs."

"As a 'outflow from the seat of God', you have to do what the teachers say. This is your instinct—even if you don't want to, the research is going on without your awareness. If you go on like this, you realize , will eventually kill everyone boringly, and of course—her. In this blank, regular world, only you will be left in the end—whether the woman does it or you do it.”

"An absolute ability user, cursed by ability, sees a doomed future—after all, you do not belong to this world, and you are doomed to despair."

The 'he' in his consciousness gradually became his own appearance.

His voice was just like his original self, without any flatness.

"I am you - an existence you created with no emotion, 'look at you and analyze you through someone else's eyes'. If you don't want to collapse, please stop trying to read the emotions in memory."

……

……

It is now mid-July.

With the continuous emergence of memory fragments, he gradually understood what happened before.

——I also know what I am doing.

The brainwashing idea has been basically completed, and the rest is to deal with the details and contradictions.

If this continues... by the end of the year, a lot of experiments will basically be invested.

Although I know that such a thing is absolutely unwilling, and I want to stop——

However, once I think about it this way, the memory affects complex emotions, tearing the nerves in the brain all the time, and the pain is so painful that I lose consciousness—after waking up, only a residual weak sense of resistance remains.

In this way, he slept longer and longer.

— but couldn't stop this kind of thing.

The 'feeling' is the existence that brings him pain and drives the 'device' to prevent him from resisting—

'Feeling' is also the existence that brings him all kinds of hope and happiness——

To resolve this contradiction -

It is necessary to create an "emotionless" existence, analyze the key to the matter, and then act in an "ordered" way.

If you forcibly split yourself into two parts, the emotional self and the non-emotional self, you can slightly increase the possibility of resistance.

Even if it will still be pinned down by the 'device'.

……

"You finally understand that you are hating all of this. Hate this world, hate this fate, hate the school that tries to control everything, hate yourself who can do nothing to become an accomplice, hate who will eventually hurt you all of myself."

"In the end, you still want to destroy all of this."

"If you don't want all people's hearts to be taken away, the next thing you have to do is to analyze the operation mechanism of the 'device' with unknown intelligence, and temporarily regain the control of consciousness."

"Then, destroy this school and let everyone understand the horror of blindly worshiping power."

So... am I going to let that woman... to stain this world with despair...

I would be the culprit of all this.

Many innocent people will be implicated.

It will also brutally take away Nanami's life...

She smiles at me all the time, is there for me, she is my important person.

She is looking forward to a happy world full of smiles...

I will destroy it all...

And it might take her life...

……don't want……

I……

……

Thinking was interrupted again.

As long as a certain degree of 'feeling' is affected, it will definitely be suppressed...

……

"Excessive gentleness is weakness. Because you will be afraid of becoming a demon yourself, and you will never be forgiven and sheltered. Qihai told you before, you have to think about your own answers, and don't do things that you regret .”

"If you don't choose, it's also a choice. Do you expect a world without self-awareness?"

No... I cannot accept such a world.

Then, I will kill all of them in order to completely free them.

"So, you have to bear this kind of crime. There are no such good things in the world, they are all exchanged at equal value. When you gain the ability, you lose the autonomy of your body forever. Now if you want to come back, you have to destroy it. this world."

"False kindness will not bring any salvation. If you think you are on the right path, no one wants to change. I can foresee that if you let that woman destroy Hope Peak Academy, the world will be in chaos. The surviving students of the college will be preserved as "hope". They have been staying there tremblingly, not thinking about change, only thinking about their own affairs. Because the legal principle of this world is that "hope" must be protected Yes, as long as they have talent, they are hope. For 'hope', they must survive."

"If they still have the idea of ​​looking forward to 'another world'...they will work together to find a way out."

"Almost all people who live in this law will think that death is the greatest despair... However, if everyone in this world loses their own ideas and desires to pursue beauty, they just blindly accept their fate , Desperately pursuing ideals that do not belong to oneself, that is a world like stagnant water... just like what you saw at the beginning."

……

He remembered the lonely and melancholy expression of the nine-headed dragon.

"No matter what happens, I will, absolutely, go to undergraduate."

"There's no 'buts'!...or 'talent isn't everything, having memories leads to hope'... what a joke!"

"This kind of beautiful talk is nothing more than... Do you want to look down on people?!"

"How can people without talent be matched together!"

"My brother is such an idiot! Even though he said 'I want to help', he still wants me to stay at home! Is this contemptuous!"

"My brother inherited the 'super high school-level underworld', and in the future he will follow his father's path, and staying at home will make him farther and farther away from his brother..."

"My brother has made so many new friends here, and there are so many powerful people... My brother doesn't need me for anything. In the end, I don't even understand what my brother said. What should I do? I'm just a protected sister. I don't want to be underestimated."

"What's the point of staying by his side in an ordinary way! If you don't enter the undergraduate course, you will never catch up with him..."

"If you don't stand at the same height as him, you can't be with him..."

This is... what makes sense.

Why, people without talent don't deserve to be together.

Why, the status status situation must be considered.

Can't we laugh together if we are not of the same talent...

Why, if you don't do well, you must bear malice.

Isn't it very lonely... Isn't it very inferior...

If you need each other, let's pursue happiness together!

Who the hell told them these things...

Who the hell is it that makes them feel so useless.

Where is strong and where is weak.

What's wrong with all this...?

Then she died.

Died for such inexplicable restrictions.

……

"There is no... talent, so... what's the matter? Human life... there is no difference."

"Of course there is a difference. Give it up, iron filings will not turn into diamonds, and naturally you will not treat them the same way. A useful person will always be a useful person...but those incompetent people do not admit their incompetence, but instead Delusion to climb up—really, that's why I hate those mortals. They are so useless, but they have the audacity to follow..."

"What you said...is not right. Talent...is not everything...no matter who they are, they all have...their...dreams, their...desires..."

"...and I will do what I can do!"

"Ah, that's right. But for the useless guy, it's just a 'delusion'. Only the talented can really control the fate, and the rest of the guys are just cogs in the big machine, following the engraved trajectory , just live on without thinking about anything. Even if a gear breaks occasionally, there are as many replacements as there are.”

"And they can only rely on the talented... It should be grateful to have something to eat - this is fate."

Ha, this is fate...

If this is fate... this is the world...

Even if I bear all the sins... I will destroy all of this...

Will many people be involved...

I, will not pray for anyone's understanding and forgiveness.

I, am 'Super High School Level Despair'——

I want to deny, this hopeless world.

It must have been a colossal disaster.

If people really look forward to that happy world full of smiles...

Together, they will eventually realize the right path and strive to fight against despair and pursue true hope.

——If it doesn’t work, then go to hell.

Then come and curse me together.

……

"You...you really haven't changed anything."

"As expected, you are still—Hinata So."

"Thinking of a future where everyone loses resistance and obeys fate, it becomes reckless and difficult to control thinking. This makes the feeling that I have always remembered but suppressed explode... because you hate so much, The self who can see everything but can't do anything..."

"But being able to think like this...why haven't you been suppressed...who are you..."

I am... who...

How can I think of such crazy things so naturally...

Is it because I unconsciously brought in Hinata's thinking?

I am...Hinata So?

What a joke.

Even with his body, his memory, I could never be that incompetent—and it would bring despair to the world and ruin countless lives.

As long as you follow the words of the 'teachers', everyone, at least, can live.Conflicts will also be completely resolved.

If you don't pursue things you shouldn't pursue, you won't be infected with despair.

I shouldn't have feelings.

Falling into a human, limited perspective, using power to satisfy selfish desires - that is the greatest sin of being a 'hope'.

But... Seven Seas...

This kind of me, the me who will completely destroy your life in the end...

But you smiled at me like this and called me "friend"...

How can I... redeem my sins to you?

If you want to atone for your sins... If you regain your consciousness and destroy the research materials... "Those people" will definitely realize your loss of control and destroy your consciousness again... Their methods will definitely make you a "tool" again ...

Who am I... who am I... (pain)

That woman is planning a move too... (pain) If I can kill her... (pain)

Even if she is killed... "Degenerate Absolute Talent"... there is no guarantee that a second one will not appear... (Pain)

The teacher (pain) will not allow...I...

If I forget all of this (pain)... how can I... stop this kind of thing... from happening...

So I...must...let this world...completely abide by the law...

Thoroughly...put an end to...everything...evil...desire...

Without...hope...you won't...be infected with...despair...

What should I do... (pain)

Use her (pain)... to destroy... this desperate, everything...

This is... the me who regained my thinking (pain)... a choice I can make with my own will (pain)...

I...would be the (pain)...source of all...despair...

I am... what I deserve (pain)...

!

Why... I... will continue to think about... such things...

Who's coming... Who's coming...

... seven seas ...

……I……

Thinking interrupted.

Consciousness sank into deep darkness.

He, again, fell into a deep sleep.