[Net King] Take away my heart

We are the mirror and the face in the mirror.

We taste the moment, the taste of eternal life,

We are the pain and the savior of the pain.

We are sweet, cool water, and jars to splash.

—Molana Jalaluddin Rumi

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Jiayin always speaks very quietly.

Perhaps because she just came up from the countryside, she felt unable to adapt to many things in the city.She is overly timid and vigilant in front of anyone, and she will never speak loudly without scruples even in her own home.Mom and Dad often told me to take care of Jiayin, take her around, get familiar with the surrounding environment, and help her adapt to life here as soon as possible.

I really want to do it.Compared with my parents, I feel that I can understand Jiayin’s fear better. I seem to know what she is afraid of, because I have also experienced similar empathy.I really wanted to comfort her and tell her that it was okay and that everything was slowly getting better.I really want to tell her just leave everything to me, I will be with you, I will protect you, so don't be afraid...but I can't.

In order for Jiayin to have a care in the school, my parents let her enter the same middle school as me.

"But... is this kid really okay? So scared of life..."

The worries of my parents are also my worries.Jiayin is very obedient, as long as her parents tell her, she will obediently do it without saying a word. Even in matters such as choosing a school, Jiayin completely obeys her parents' arrangements and never expresses any opinions.

Is this really good?I haven't asked Jiayin, nor will I ask her.I just felt a little bit worried, but silently thanked that she was still with me.

Yes, as long as that's the case, as long as she's still where I can see her.

Even if I can't reach out to help her, as long as I can get her where I can, even if I can only see her from time to time every day, and see her calm and normal, I will be satisfied.

"Jiayin, are you going well in school? If you encounter any difficulties—"

If you encounter any difficulties, you must come to me... After thinking about it, I still couldn't say this to her.

"I have some friends at school... whom I can turn to when I'm having trouble." That's all I can say.

"It's all right...it's all going well."

"That's good……"

Knowing that there is nothing I can do, I can only smile wryly at Jiayin.

Although we are in the same school, even though we are in the same grade, we hardly even have the chance to say hello.Go to school separately, leave school separately, do their own things, and make their own friends.The ultimate end is nothing but going back to the same home.

Unlike brothers and sisters in ordinary families, Jiayin and I never quarrel.We are humble to each other, friendly and polite, and get along more peacefully than any brother or sister.

In the eyes of my parents, we may be obedient, well-behaved and reassuring brothers and sisters, but I know, I always know, there is always something important missing between me and Jiayin.

Sanada and I entered Lihai as classmates as we wished. We met Liu in school, and the three joined the tennis club together, and became close friends who supported each other.

What about Jiayin?Did she also make many new friends?When I was already traveling with Sanada and Yanagi, Jiayin was still alone.I always see her figure coming and going alone through the classroom window, and that figure makes me feel unstoppable anxiety.

So I silently decided to find an opportunity to introduce Liu and Sanada to her. Since I can't take care of her personally, at least let someone I trust take care of her for me-this is the only way.

But soon I found that my worries were unnecessary. Jiayin adapted to this school faster than I thought, and made friends of her own faster than I thought.

Bunta Marui, Jack Kuwahara, Reika Miyake.

When I heard these names from her very occasionally, I immediately remembered them.

I pretended to mention these people who caught my attention to Liu, who was good at collecting data, and inquired about them intentionally or unconsciously.Only when Liu said that they were all Jiayin's classmates and there was nothing special about them, did I relax a little.

Of course I will not directly ask Jiayin what kind of friends you have made, nor will I let her know that I am inquiring about her friends.I just couldn't stop myself from caring—anxious and repressed caring.

This inexpressible concern often distresses me.

So I decided to devote more of myself to campus life. I actively participated in club activities, and with the experience accumulated in the tennis club and some natural talents, I quickly laid a foundation in the tennis department.To my delight, both Sanada and Yanagi have the same level of prowess and passion for tennis that no one else can match.We, known as the first-year freshman monster trio, became famous day by day and grew rapidly day by day. That is when we found a common goal.

"Li Hai's three consecutive hegemony, there is absolutely no dead end!"

We, who reached the summit at the first national meeting in the first year of junior high school, raised the trophy and made an oath of pride.

After that, all three of us sat firmly in the primary position with undisputed records, and from this I became the core figure of the tennis department and eventually became the minister.

——That guy Yukimura's strength is bottomless, it's simply too scary, a first-year manager!There will definitely be great achievements in the future.

Whether it is praise or slander, I am indifferent.I just want to finish all the things I want to do while I can still do it. As for the future, I haven't carefully imagined it.

Never imagine anything too rosy, this is the reality I learned in the hospital.It is true that now I am with everyone in ordinary classes, studies, and even sports and competitions... But I don't think that I have completely got rid of that torment. I still have to go back to the hospital for checkups on a regular basis. As soon as you step into the gate of the hospital and smell the familiar smell of medicine, the feeling of uneasiness will revive in your heart.

——No problem, Yukimura-kun is recovering very well now, and his body is better than the average person's.

Only when he heard the doctor in charge say that, his tense mood would relax like a pardon.

But what followed was worry and deep thinking about the next routine inspection.

——A person as powerful as Yukimura-kun should not be afraid of anything, right?No one here can defeat you, Son of God...

There is no such thing as a fearless person.

The reason why man is a man but cannot become a god is because man must have something to fear.

Even the Son of God is no different.

However, what I am afraid of is not the pain that has lasted for several years, nor is it the death that may return at any time, nor is it any opponent that needs to be defeated.

My fear comes from protection.

Just the mood of wanting to protect her—a mood that is not allowed.

Knowing what he was afraid of, he wanted to protect her so much, but he couldn't get too close to her.

Carefully maintaining a distance, worrying, wandering, it's just that I don't even have the courage to break the agreement——

With me like this, how can I be called the Son of God?

The author has something to say: here is Toru (kneeling) who has completely entered the monthly update mode and has no face

The downturn has unexpectedly lasted for a long time, and the miserable situation of not being able to squeeze out a word for several months is still going on QAQ

Disappointed by my incomprehensible emotions, I tried to cheer up but couldn't do anything...

I'm really sorry that it took so long for everyone to read the last update~QAQ

Recently, a favorite soldier passed away, his name is RobinMcLaurimWilliams

It is very sad that two of my favorite masters passed away in the same year

Maybe no one knows that the Dead Poets Society in this article is inspired by DeadPoetsSociety

OCaptain! MyCaptain!

The expression of Robin who turned his head and smiled during the call is unforgettable forever

Hope someone in heaven can make him laugh, may he meet other masters there and have a long relaxing vacation

Subsequent updates may still have to maintain a slow pace of monthly updates... Please forgive me~QAQ

Although the speed is not strong, Toru will guarantee the quality of the text, as well as the beginning and the end~

Thank you little angels for your tolerance m--m you are the source of motivation for Toru~